


As We Cry These Bitter Tears

by OMsRandomWriter



Series: The Ripples of Life [1]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV), Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Brother-Sister Relationships, Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, F/F, F/M, Gen, It's ya girl with the sisfic, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Tags Contain Spoilers, Tags May Change, Winchester Sister, sisfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-15 19:07:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 25,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29440911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OMsRandomWriter/pseuds/OMsRandomWriter
Summary: Given the chance, would you give up everything you have to change everything you know? Kathrine Winchester, the eldest child of John and Mary Winchester, had accepted that her world was ending. She had accepted that her family was gone, having torn itself apart, that she was the last being alive on Earth... that is, until an opportunity gave light to vital information, but it came at a price. She no longer exists.
Relationships: Castiel (Supernatural)/Original Female Character(s), Castiel (Supernatural)/Original Winchester Character(s), Dean Winchester & Original Winchester Character(s), Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester, Jack Kline & Original Female Character(s), Jimmy Novak/Original Winchester Character(s) (Supernatural), John Winchester & Original Winchester Character(s), Lisa Braeden/Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester & Original Winchester Character(s)
Series: The Ripples of Life [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2162532
Kudos: 5





	1. Opening

**Author's Note:**

> Finally watched season 15... I cried.  
> This is my way of coping.  
> \-------------------------------------  
> I've given much thought to if I'd ever published my Supernatural Fics, especially with the series now officially over. I want to do a test run, to share my ideas. Sure, they're overused (Sister fic) but each one has a twist, and I honestly like how the rewrite of the one I wrote out is coming along. So, let me know what you guys think? Kathrine might seem like a Mary Sue at first, and I'm doing my best to correct that. I want her to be as human as possible. (Also, Jophiel is a "non-canon" (exact words on the wiki) Archangel. She's considered to be the Archangel of Wisdom, Understanding, and Judgement, as well as the angel in charge of the cherubim. She's also one of the few female angels!)

_I've only heard stories of what happened with the fight against Amara, the Darkness, from God, our Father, He Who Created. They were two sides of a coin, neither existing without the other. He wished for bright creatures, for light, while she wished for corruption, for dark. Their verbal fights turned physical, and after an unknown amount of time, He had managed to lock Amara away with the help of the Seven and placed her deep within the Earth's core._

_There, he created me and the seraphim. Of course, then, we were normal angels, only meant for the kindness and caring we're typically painted for today. Then God made a grievous mistake. He created the Leviathans, to which they began to consume anything in their path. Ariel, our eldest angel at the time, attempted to make peace with them, but she was quickly overwhelmed and… eaten._

_God grieved, creating Purgatory, and throwing the Leviathans within the ever-changing cage, creating us eight archangels and ten seraphim, my true brothers and sisters, keys and locks if they were to ever escape. The other monsters quickly corrupted as Amara's darkness began to leak, and God created newer, lesser angels to help keep the Darkness at bay. Once we angels were finished, he attempted one last race; Humans. I was still relatively young, and He showed no sign of speeding up my aging process like he did my other brothers and sisters._

_When He had finished with humanity, he brought forth Adam and Lilith to me and asked which I believe would be more susceptible to corruption. I gazed at their souls, and I wept, for they were as bright as Helel. I made a terrible mistake, that day. I looked over them, and I failed to see the already festering darkness within Lilith. I said that Adam was in danger, and I was the one who suggested that perhaps He should guard Adam. I watched from afar as Helel corrupted Lilith, and how he later renamed himself. The War came next, and despite us being on separate sides, he still sought me out every day and made sure I did not feel the result of Heaven being torn in two. When I matured at the end of the war, God placed me in charge of Heaven's Choirs, a job Raphael could no longer hold with his duties, and told me to heal the Earth._

_I stayed that way, healing Earth and its creatures until 1379 when one of my brothers approached me. I was by no means a vengeful angel, but he, however, was. He wished for me to use the Choirs to raze the Earth, to kill all of humanity. I came to realize while wondering why he asked that, that he had sided with Helel in the War, and that he was never caught. When he returned for my answer, I said no. He grew angry, and in a fit of rage, he took the hilt of his cursed blade and hacked through my wings._

_Wings to an angel are like a lung or liver to a human. They are very much a part of us and are forbidden to touch unless you are close siblings or mates. Archangels are close siblings with one another, as are the Seraph, but he was a mere soldier. It was a violation and a deadly one at that. My brother Cassiel and sister Sariel found me shortly after, to which they brought me to God. It was the second time I had seen him weep in such a way he did, and despite all of His Might, Grace, and Will, the curse would not lift to allow Him to grow me new wings. Later, in the night, I awoke to Him giving me a final blessing before departing Heaven until the End of Times._

_I lay for two centuries, forgotten and alone until I managed to drag myself to the Cliffside, where Ramiel was standing. He could feel the blessing upon me, and helped me up so I could toss myself off the edge; so I could Fall and become human. He was the most loyal to God of all of us, and he had seen my Falling within a vision he had given the Prophet. He stood as I cast myself off of the edge, my Grace not even attempting to leave me as it would've any other angel. I woke two years later, as an infant, and I quickly realized what God's blessing was._

_I could live as a human as many times as I wanted, and when I wished to return to the Host, it would be as a Nephilim, rather than a full angel, so I would not feel the pain of my lost wings as badly. I went through hundreds of different lives, each as different as the next. Sometimes, I would depart early due to disease or an accident, and sometimes I would be able to live well into my eighties._

_Finally, I was born Kathrine Winchester. I woke when I was three this time, and I could hear crying. I found Dean, and I felt a love nothing could match. This was a baby brother, who's soul was whole and pure. I cared for him, treated him like royalty when John and Mary weren't looking. Then Samuel came along, and it felt as if I was with my eldest two brothers in Heaven again! I found it easy, locking my Grace away to be completely human, just for those two little boys. But Azazel came when Sam was six months, and I felt the world break at my feet. I had to be careful, for John was killing anything and everything Supernatural for information on the demon that killed his wife._

_I could see it within him; he wouldn't hesitate to torture me for the information I knew. I stayed silent, only calling of my Choirs when I was alone, or only with Sam and Dean, but still, I was foolish. I soon began to push my boundaries, and when I was eighteen, I was caught healing Dean from a split lip he got at school. I had fights with my other families about my powers, but the one with John… hurt more than I'd care to admit. Me leaving my younger brothers struck them possibly harder than me. Dean became the good little soldier and Sam the ever disobedient son._

_I'm ashamed that I didn't watch over them as I promised. I spent years chasing after a mate I couldn't find, up until I got news of John Winchester's death. How shitty was it of a daughter when she was reluctant to attend her father's funeral? But the man I was seeing - a Jimmy Novak, who recently divorced from his wife, who got custody of their daughter - insisted I went. He stayed behind, a bad memory with in-laws was his reasoning, and when I returned, I knew something was off with my brothers. What was I supposed to say to them?_ Oh, hey Sam, hey Dean. Look, this might sound odd, but have you happened to be dreaming about two dickwads named Michael and Lucifer asking for you to say Yes? Oh, no reason why I'm asking, only that they want to fry your brains out while destroying the entire world for the angels' peace… _Yeah, like that would go over well with them._

_I got lost in my life again; Jimmy and I married and a month later, Bobby called me. Dean was dead, killed by Hellhounds after his year deal was up to save Sam's life. Why hadn't they talked to me about it? It came to me that if I ever wanted to see them again, I'd have to tell Jimmy the truth. So, one night, I sat him down. At first, he was wary. Demons, werewolves, wraiths, and tulpa? I'd be suspicious too had I not been created as a creature myself. So I began to speak of angels, and I talked about my falling._

_It was the first time I showed a human my physical wings._

_I knew Jimmy was a devout man, and I knew even this was a tipping point. I was careful not to speak too loudly or go to move suddenly, so it came as a shock when he had just smiled and said it didn't change a thing. When we went to Indiana, where Sam was last seen, I had been waiting for him to get back from his Sunday prayers when…_

He never showed…

_I wasn't blind, I could see his soul had been shelled to become a vessel, as had Sam's and Dean's. But to actually have him ripped… it hurt far more than it should have. I tried to go back to my life before Jimmy being taken… but I just couldn't._

_Then he came back, his horrid coat ripped and uneven, his tie on backward…_

_My heaven, just in one glance, but his eyes were desperate. My brothers knew the angel who he was made for; the angel who had no idea who I was. When my brothers returned, he had helped me dye and cut my hair in a desperate attempt just as his ex showed for Claire's visitation. Things went poorly real quick after that. It was one thing to know your brothers were in league with an angel; it was another to see your husband bleeding out on the floor of some dusty warehouse as your step-daughter watched over coldly. I wanted to damn him, for making sure that 'Castiel' would keep me safe, but the look in his eyes as I grasped his hand… until the hand wrenched itself away as if it burned._

_I kept to myself, mourning the loss of my husband while Claire kept me company. Amelia had been lost in the scuffle, and seeing as I was in her will to receive custody, the courts allowed me to raise her._

_At least, until I let it slip Sam and Dean were my brothers._

_She stopped trusting me._

_Suddenly, the Apocalypse was finished before it even began, and then, civil war. I had to listen to my Choirs beg for my return, not knowing why I commanded them to side with Castiel, not truly knowing why I remained on Earth._

_Leviathans, and then after that, everyone_ fell.

_Suddenly, the Choirs who had known where I was surrounded and guarded me, but Claire…_

_Claire ran away as soon as she thought she could. Federkiel, my Second, did his best to search for her, but with the war happening again, and the boys now actively searching for me again, having realized that I had been an archangel rather than a normal one, I was forced to lay low._

_Forced to watch and feel as they died, over and over, without my help, without even a word from me…_

_And then, when I thought nothing could get worse, Amara herself came to my door._

_She had just been a child, or, at least, in a child's body, and she was curious about me, the one who made God stop creating Archangels and Seraphims. Perhaps it was the fact that she was my only tie to what I had once been or the knowledge that I couldn't let a little girl roam by herself, but I allowed her to stay._

_And that's how Crowley found us._

_That's how Sam, Dean, and Cas found_ me.

_Cas couldn't, wouldn't, believe that Jophiel had been in front of him all long._

_In the end, a Nephilim was born, and while he was a teenager, it was obvious he was just a child!_

_Then God came back, but He wasn't…_

_He hadn't been the deity who left._

_He was far angrier, less merciful._

_And it wasn't until half of humanity disappeared did I realize what was happening._

_That we had somehow brought forth the rapture._

_And it wasn't until I was the last one left, Sam's, Dean's, and Castiel's blood smeared all over me, did He seem to recognize me._

* * *

"Dana? You're still alive?"

" _Jophiel_ _,_ or better yet, Kathrine Winchester." She corrected with a snarl. "What the fuck did we do to deserve this? We were saving the world! Why? Why did you kill everyone?"

God stared at her for far longer than she wanted before answering. "You were always my favorite, even in worlds where you didn't exist. They always demanded, and I always answered Michael, but it was you."

"No, you answer the fucking question!"

"Another Sam and Dean, they forced my hands. If I don't stop them, create a burn line now, they'll destroy the entire multiverse."

She acted far quicker than she could ever think, and she was sure the only reason she had got within a foot of Him is that He allowed her to, the tip of the sword against His throat. "Don't fucking lie. You don't think I haven't thought of that before, especially since Jack arrived? What is the _truth_ _?_ "

He frowned at her, and it was suffocating, and she felt like she was choking as He answered, far too calmly. "A clean slate, wash my hands clean completely. No more mistakes."

"Mistakes are how we learn!" She shrieked through the pressure. "Criticism, and reviewing, and mistakes are all part of growing and starting anew! Bring them back! Bring them back now!"

"Jophiel, you're above such begging."

"Begging! Begging was when my wings were clipped by a brother, and instead of being fallen, he was promoted! Begging was trying to understand why I was forced to be a human, over and over, forced to love and lose, without knowing the full story! This is anger! You've forced things You shouldn't've forced. Look around You. Look! Does this look like a clean fucking slate to You?"

All throughout her rant, He didn't even twitch, He just… _stared_ _._ "You're right." She blinked. "It's not a clean slate. Not yet."

Suddenly, her words hit her.

"Oh, _fu-_ "


	2. Phantom Traveler(s)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get messy

" _-ck,_ "

She was standing in the middle of an aisle, airplane seats on either side of her as people screamed. Briefly, she could feel the presence of a demon, but she ignored it, immediately sitting down in one of the empty seats and fastening herself in, well aware of how one woman refused to look away from her as she screamed.

_This is hell,_ she decided, as time seemed to slow down as, from her seat, she could see through the open doorway, the ground getting closer and closer. There were several sickening crunches of bones as they impacted, knocking even her out as they began to roll.

* * *

_"Dean, it's, uh, it's Jerry Panowski. You and your dad helped me out a couple years back."_

_"Oh, right, yeah. Up in Kittanning, Pennsylvania, the poltergeist thing. It's not back, is it?"_

_"No. No. Thank god, no. But it's something else, and...uh, I think it could be a lot worse."_

_"What is it?"_

_"Can we talk in person?"_

* * *

Jerry looked everywhere but the two Hunters as they replayed the black box recording. "Took off from here, crashed about two hundred miles south. Now, they're saying mechanical failure. The cabin depressurized somehow. Nobody knows why. Over a hundred people on board. Only eight got out alive. The pilot was one. His name is Chuck Lambert. He's a good friend of mine. Chuck is, uh...well, he's pretty broken up about it. Like it was his fault."

"You don't think it was?"

"No, I don't."

"Jerry, we're gonna need passenger manifests, um, a list of survivors."

"All right."

"And, uh, anyway we can take a look at the wreckage?

"The other stuff is no problem. But the wreckage...fellas, the NTSB has it locked down in an evidence warehouse. No way I've got that kind of clearance."

Dean frowned before nodding. "No problem."

They started to walk away as Jerry called out. "There's something else. A woman; blonde, roughly a couple of years older than you, appeared from nowhere, according to one of the passengers. She's in the hospital still."

"Nowhere?" Sam asked. "Like, smoke nowhere or nowhere-nowhere?"

"Beats me. Lady was crazy when we pulled her out. Kept mumbling something about angels."

* * *

"There are some agents here, wanting to talk to you," the nurse said, and Kathrine rolled her eyes, but nodded, looking up at the ceiling as the two agents came in. When she glanced at them, she froze at the sight of her very much so _younger_ brothers.

Dean was frozen as well, whereas Sam was just looking at her, unimpressed. "Uh," she started. "I can explain?"

"How did you appear on the plane miss…?" Sam began, making her frown towards him. Was… was he seriously playing the 'I don't know you' card?

" _Mom_ _?_ " Dean whispered, making her look at him like _he_ was insane.

"Don't tell me you two forgot about me," she scoffed, trying to remember why they looked so young. They had been helping Jack sort out his powers when… when… she frowned, trying to remember. The two shared a look before Sam slowly shook his head. "It's me. Kathrine." Still nothing. She glanced between them, trying to catch one of their eyes and-

Still nothing.

"How do you think we know you?" Dean asked.

"I'm your sister," she answered, immediately seeing the rage on Dean's face and disbelief on Sam's. "Get a DNA test if you want. I don't know how the hell you don't remember me, or why both of you look so young for being 39 and 37."

"I'm 22," Sam said, voice low and slow. "I think we need to talk about this _after_ the case."

"A case?" she once again looked to the ceiling. "Oh! You mean the demon on the plane? I couldn't deal with it and get fastened in safely."

"Which brings us to the original question," Dean growled out. "How did you just appear on that plane?"

"I don't know," Kathrine said honestly. "One second we, you two, Cas, and I were training Jack, helping him with his powers, and the next, I'm just… on a plane filled with screaming people."

Sam looked like he wanted to ask a million questions. "It's a demon?"

"I know a demonic presence when I feel one," she scoffed. "Like I said, I would've gotten it if we weren't, y'know, _crashing_ _._ "

"Right, we'll be back," Dean interrupted, grabbing Sam's arm. "Don't you try to run."

"Where would I go, the Bunker?" She got such a confused look, it honestly had her head pounding as they left the room. "What the hell happened?"

* * *

The boys did indeed come back, and they had all sorts of papers with them.

Curious, she picked up some and read it over, brows furrowing as she realized they were all about demons and how to exorcise them, rather than kill them. "You don't have the knife or Colt anymore?" she asked, more towards Sam, as Dean was glaring at her.

"What do you mean?"

"Ruby's demon-killing knife? The Colt Gun?" they shared a look, making her huff. "Would someone just tell me what's going on? Why are you two acting like you don't know me? I changed your diapers for christ's sake!"

"We never had a sister!" Dean snapped. "I don't know what you are to pass the tests," the tests, of course, just being silver, salt, and holy water, rather than the other half dozen things they had before, "but I'd damn well remember if we had a sister."

"Not possible," she snapped back. "I remember growing up alongside you! When you were three, you climbed the peach tree growing in the front yard cause you were told you couldn't have any. You fell and you broke your arm. Dad panicked and sped to the hospital, and Mom was so worried, she-," Kathrine cut herself off, not wanting to say the last bit of information.

"Don't call them that," Dean growled out.

"Fucking-" she turned around and marched out of the room, towards the nurse's station.

"What's wrong then?" the older woman asked, and she let a tight smile show.

"My idiot of a brother doesn't believe me when I say we're related. Would it be possible to have a DNA test done on the three of us? Please?" She threw on her best puppy dog eyes, making the woman laugh and pull out the forms.

* * *

The results came back exactly how she expected them to.

Dean didn't take it very well, but Sam was all grins, asking all sorts of things, as she was 6 years older than him and remembered their parents before Hunting very well.

"So when are we going to get this," she nodded towards the pages about demons.

"We," Dean motioned towards him and Sam. "Are. You aren't." As she stared at him, he scowled. "I don't know what creature you are, but it's not human. We didn't have a sister, and we don't need one now." There was a shaky undertone, a type of pleading.

"You think I'm a liability," she realized before snarling. "I'm 41, asshole! I've been hunting since I was 6!"

Before she could say anything else, Dean's phone rang, making him quickly answer it. "Hello? Oh, hey, Jerry. Wha-Jerry, I'm sorry. What happened?" There was a pause and Dean's face went dark. "Where'd this happen? I'll try to ignore the irony in that. Nothing. Jerry, hang in there, all right? We'll catch up with you soon."

"Another crash?" Sam asked, making Dean nod.

"Yeah, let's go,"

They started to pack up, and she hesitated, clutching some of the papers tighter. Sam started to leave, but hesitated as well, looking to her and then Dean, and she glanced at him as well.

_Please don't leave me again…_

Dean also stopped after he left the room, and when he turned around, his face morphed into one of surprise before quickly closing off. "No," he said. "She's not coming."

" _She_ has a name," Kathrine snapped, but her breath hitched and her throat felt like it was starting to close off.

" _Dean_ _,_ " Sam said at the same time, making him look between them again for groaning.

"Stupid damn face," he grumbled, making her frown and share a look with Sam.

"I wasn't… making a face?" she mumbled.

"You kinda were," Sam argued. "Let's get you out."

* * *

"Really? Well, thank you for taking our survey, And if you do plan to fly, please don't forget your friends at United Britannia Airlines. Thanks." As Sam hung up, she scratched off the other two names, grimacing. "All right. That takes care of Blaine Sanderson and Dennis Holloway. They're not flying anytime soon."

"So our only wildcards are the flight attendant and Princess back there," Dean said, making her scowl.

"Don't call me that," she muttered. It's what _he_ had called her when she was still a fledgling and the war hadn't begun yet. "I only plan on getting on a plane if I absolutely have to."

"Right. Her sister Karen said her flight leaves Indianapolis at eight pm. It's her first night back on the job." Sam explained as the radio began to play a new song.

" _Well I get up at seven, yeah And I go to work at nine,_ "

Dean groaned. "That sounds like just our luck."

"That's a five-hour drive, man, even with you behind the wheel," Sam pointed out, and Kathrine glanced out the window before very carefully undoing one of the lesser knots and sending a jolt of Grace through the car.

Dean yelped as both he and Sam were shocked by static electricity. "What did you do to Baby?" he demanded, pulling over sharply to glare at her.

"I made it to where we won't attract any attention should you decide to… go faster than legal limits," she replied. "I don't know how you lost your memories, or how I'm essentially 14 years in the past, but all I know is that I'm going to help, however I can." He just kept staring at her, making her raise her eyebrows. "Are you going to drive or not Dean-o? We have a plane to catch."

* * *

They got there in three hours, rather than five, and as Sam and Dean attempted to talk Amanda out of getting on the plane, she found the ATMs, making sure that any cameras 'glitched' as she inserted a blank card, hoping she managed to create it correctly. When it beeped and showed the amount, she grinned and withdrew enough for three tickets, buying them as Sam walked up to her.

"Here," she said, giving him two of the tickets, which had one in first class, one in business. "I'm in coach. It'll be easier if one of us is in each of the cabin areas."

"How did you get-,"

"Relax, I'm not stealing any money. I'll explain things in more detail when this is sorted, promise." She absentmindedly stuck out her pinky, forgetting she wasn't speaking to Cas or Jack, and grimaced when she got a weird look. "Sorry, uh, Cas, Jack, and I always… It doesn't matter. Let's just go get boarded, yeah?"

* * *

Dean was jumpy as soon as they stepped onto the plane, and it seemed to get worse as he realized that Sam wouldn't be sitting with him. He glared at her, and she just shrugged, sitting in the coach seat she had been assigned to, which was thankfully an aisle seat.

About 20 minutes into the flight, Sam came to the back, no doubt under the guise of using the restroom, though he sat across from her. "Any idea on who it could be?"

The blonde let out a hum and closed her eyes, tilting her head back. "No, but they are definitely on the plane. You got the chant ready?"

"Where's your copy?" he asked, showing the book, and she just shrugged and tapped her head. "You've memorized it?"

"I mean, with how Crowley hunted me, I had to," she shrugged. "You'll learn it in time too."

Sam left, and a few minutes later, she could see him peek his head around the curtain. Sighing, she stood up and walked to him. "Not Amanda," he said. "We think it might be the copilot." as he said this, the plane shook again. "She's not going to believe us," he continued, turning to Dean.

"Twelve minutes, dude." he muttered, moving into the back area with the other two following.

"Oh, hi. The flight's not too bumpy for you, I hope." The flight attendant looked over at her and Sam curiously

"Actually, that's kind of what we need to talk to you about."

She watched as Sam pulled the curtain shut before turning back to the flight attendant. "What can I do for you?"

"We believe that this plane is going to crash," she said. "Similar to 2485."

The woman's smile disappeared. "Who are you?"

"We're specialists," Sam replied. "We know something brought down that plane and it wasn't a mechanical failure."

"We need your help to stop it from happening again." Dean finished.

"I'm sorry, I-I'm very busy. I have to go back-" As she tried to walk away, Dean gently grabbed her arm, stopping her. "Wait a second. I'm not gonna hurt you, okay? But listen to me, uh...The pilot in 2485, Chuck Lambert. He's dead."

"Chuck is… dead?"

Kathrine's mind flashed back to the not-prophet, and how she had said those words, once upon a time, after Dean had called, saying that they had stopped the apocalypse. "He died in a plane crash. Now, that's two plane crashes in two months. That doesn't strike you as strange?"

"You saw whoever opened the door, didn't you?" she asked, getting a hesitant nod. "And he had pure black eyes?" Another nod. "He was, is a demon. He's possessing the copilot. If you bring him back here, we can stop the plane from crashing."

Amanda hesitated, looking between the three of them. "I… ok."

As she walked to the cockpit, she could feel Dean staring at her. "How persuasive are you lady?"

"The least, believe it or not," she shot back. "You two, you have all the plot armor. I'm just along for the ride." She saw the copilot following Amanda, which had her immediately ducking out of the way, reaching for a knife and gun that wasn't there. Dean handed over the journal to Sam, who opened it to the page Kathrine faintly recalled writing when she was ten and John had been gone for almost two days.

"Yeah, what's the problem?" the man asked, almost immediately getting punched in the face by Dean as an answer. She watched as he put ducktape over his mouth.

"Wait. What are you doing? You said you were just gonna talk to him." The attendant protested, but Kathrine began to pull her away.

"We are gonna talk to him." She felt the woman freeze as Dean splashed the demon with holy water, making the skin sizzle.

"Oh, my god. What's wrong with him?" she whispered.

"Come on," she tugged on the woman's arm. "You need to be outside the curtain. Keep everyone calm."

"Don't let anybody in, okay?" Sam added. "Can you do that? Can you do that? Amanda?"

After a second, the woman nodded. "Okay."

"Hurry up, I don't know how much longer I can hold him," Dean's voice had her moving, pressing a foot onto the demon's back.

" _Regna terrae, cantate Deo, psallite Domino-_ "

Either she was weaker than she remembered, or the demon was a heavy hitter because, after a slight struggle, he managed to escape her and Dean and grabbed Sam by the collar. "I know what happened to your girlfriend! She must have died screaming! Even now, she's burning!" Kathrine wanted to frown because wasn't Eileen ok?

And then it hit her; _Jessica_.

"Sam!"

Shaking her head, she grappled the demon away, cursing as it smoked away. "It's still here!" She called out, grabbing at one of the walls to stay standing as the turbulence grew tenfold. "Sam, you have to finish it!"

She saw him fumble for the book. Her fingers twitched, and the book slid closer to him, allowing him to grab for it. As he finished it, the plane leveled out, and she could feel a knot in her chest slowly start to loosen.

"Look at you, saving the day," she said, grinning. "Nice work you two."

* * *

She listened to the voicemail Dean had on speaker, breath catching as she realized… she had forgotten what John had sounded like.

"So, case over, the demon is gone. What's your story then?" Dean asked, hanging up and looking at Kathrine.

"Well… This is 2005. I was from 2020. You can do the math," she shrugged, not quite looking anywhere. "I don't think this was Jack's doing. He was always so careful with the rifts, especially with Cas or I around."

"You mention them a lot," Sam noted.

"Cas is…" she paused, unsure of what to say. "He's a friend. Not my friend, one of yours. Or will be, anyway. We've never really… seen eye to eye."

"And Jack?"

"The closest thing all of us had to a son," she shrugged, taking the beer offered. "His father was a creature who was out to get us for over ten years, but his mother was a victim, and Jack was too. We had a whole nature versus nurture debate over it. Nurture won, by the way. He's the sweetest kid I've ever met." when she finished talking, she had a bittersweet smile on her face.

"So you're, what, our sister from a different dimension then?" Dean asked.

"Maybe? It's possible, given the number of times we've crossed worlds. It takes a lot of power though. The only ones I can think of that could've sent me over are… God… Amara…"

"Amara? Alright, let's go find her, see if she can get you back," She laughed at Dean's suggestion.

"Amara's been locked away since before humanity began, Dean. She's angry at everything. If we let her out, she's going to kill everyone and thing." He scowled at her explanation. "Look, I'm probably gonna be here for a while. The last time I went into a different dimension, I got stuck in there for almost six months. At least this time, the ATMs are working, so I can provide for as long as I stay."

As she held up the blank card, Sam took it and examined it. "It's blank."

"Thanks, captain obvious," Dean snarked.

"Jerk,"

"Bitch,"

Rolling her eyes, she grinned at the familiar banter, sliding off the back of the impala and moving into the back seat. _If this is a dream_ _,_ she thought as the car started, _then please let me wake up soon._


	3. Bloody Mary

She was sleeping, dreaming of Rufus's cabin in Minnesota during the summer, with the lake and fishing dock. In the distance, she could see Sam, Dean, Mary, Claire, and Cas laughing and talking as Dean was cooking. She didn't try to walk towards them, instead sitting on a dock pillar and watching from afar.

"Katty,"

Turning, she grinned as she saw Jack, who looked… close to crying? "Hey kiddo," she said. "You real or part of the dream?"

"Real, I-I think," he replied, stepping forward. "Where are you?"

"2005, roughly December, I think. It's been pretty dry, so," she trailed off, shrugging. "Oh, and a different dimension? Maybe? I, uh… I don't exist here."

"Chuck is gone," Jack said, reaching out. "He's the one who sent you away, but I can bring you back." She looked up, and saw the gold veins mixed in his blue eyes…

And slowly shook her head. "If Chuck did something to me," she murmured. "It'll take more than a rift to bring me back. It would even be a hail mary for Chuck to undo it."

"I'll keep looking," he promised, and his tone was heartbreaking. Standing up, she drew the boy into a tight hug, not even flinching as he returned it tenfold. "I don't want you to go."

"I know baby," she whispered, feeling his face pressed into her hair. "I don't want to leave you either. So how about this, you keep me company, until I wake up, and when I do, you can start searching for me then, ok?"

He didn't verbally respond, but she felt his Grace flare before reaching out to her like a child would to their parents, making her laugh and gently guide her away from the group. "You're not angry that you got sent away?"

"I'm sad, and confused, but no, not angry," she explained. "It gives me a chance to help this world's Sam and Dean. They might not recognize me as their sister, not fully, but no matter what, I will always consider them to be my brothers." she glanced up at him, seeing the worried look, and she smiled. "Just as I will always consider you my son." He got misty-eyed again, and she just shook her head fondly. "Now, how about we go for a hike? I think I can remember the trail around the cabin."

* * *

She woke up, fading away in front of Jack who ended up begging her not to go, to Sam thrashing in his sleep with Dean doing his best to wake him up. The night before, they had found a possible case in Toledo, Ohio, and instead of stopping by Bobby's like she wanted to (she missed the old hunter; part of her never recovered when she realized she never properly got to say goodbye to him) they continued through the night, which meant Dean had only a couple hours of sleep.

"Y'know," Dean was saying as Sam rubbed his eyes. "Sooner or later we're gonna have to talk about this."

"Are we here?"

"Yep," she yawned herself, leaning against the front seat to read the newspaper. "I think one of the daughters was having a sleepover when this happened?"

"You think this could've been a prank gone wrong?" Dean asked.

"Well, one of the most common sleepover games to play is _Bloody Mary_ _,_ " Kathrine shrugged. She got a weird look. "My step-daughter had friends over a lot after her mother died. I didn't like it, but I always made sure the house was super warded so nothing could get in."

"So you don't remember this one?" she shook her head, frowning.

"I was called, at most, once a month, and even then it depended on how bad a hunt went. I only know the notable ones. So this is either a normal spirit or something really bad,"

* * *

"The newspaper said his daughter found him. She said his eyes were bleeding." Sam started, making the morgue tech shrug and pull the sheets back.

"More than that. They practically liquefied," he said, making Kathrine lean in a bit more closely.

"May I?" she asked, and the man once again shrugged. She prodded the corpse's head, trying to search for any type of smite.

"Any sign of a struggle? Maybe somebody did it to him?"

"Nope. Besides the daughter, he was all alone."

"What's the official cause of death?"

"Ah, Doc's not sure. He's thinking massive stroke, maybe an aneurysm? Something burst up in there, that's for sure."

"What do you mean?" Sam's question had her looking up before pointing with her gloved hand.

"See that? The entire vein is busted, but not just in one place like it was plaque buildup. It looks like someone cut it open with a rusty nail. He would've bled to death in his own skull." She explained, getting a curious look from the morgue tech. "Trauma nurse," she continued. "They wanted me here to see if I could see anything else."

"What would cause something like that with his eyes?"

"Capillaries can burst." the tech replied. "See a lot of bloodshot eyes with stroke victims."

Dean snorted. "Yeah? You ever see exploding eyeballs?"

_Only with a divine smite_ _,_ she thought but kept it to herself as she, once again, had to pull out her wallet for a bribe. "Can we see that police report?"

* * *

"Chances that this is just some freak medical thing?" Dean asked.

"Not possible. There was a very small trace of ectoplasm in the man's cranial cavity." she got a blank look, but she just laughed and waved it off. "Where his brain is, there was ghost goo. Whatever killed him was in his head."

"So let's go talk to the daughter," Sam said.

Kathrine shook her head, motioning for them to go. "You two go ahead. I'm going to see if stuff like this has happened before. Remember to ask about that stupid game."

* * *

"You were right; youngest daughter played the game with a friend," Dean said as he entered the room, making her glance up from where she had been using Sam's laptop. "What've you got?"

"I've done digging on any violent deaths in the area, and now that I can narrow it down a bit more…" she entered 'mirror' and 'murder', frowning at the results. "Hm, not much. No Mary's, at least."

* * *

The next day, she got Dean's phone while he and Sam went to talk to Charlie, who had been friends with the second victim. " _Can you look up the name Gary Bryman?_ " Sam asked as soon as she picked it up, making her hum.

"One second," after a few clicks, she hissed. "8-year-old killed by a hit and run, black Toyota Camry. No plates or driver. I'm feeling a bit like Garcia and I'm not sure how I like it."

" _Who?_ " Dean asked.

"Ah, an FBI tech specialist you guys will save from a nasty Mare a few years from now. You'll like her," she answered, a bit absent-mindedly. "You think Gary's death has anything to do with Jill's?"

" _Possibly,_ " Sam's voice was dark before he hung up, making her roll her eyes.

"Goodbye to you too," she muttered.

* * *

"Maybe do a nationwide search," Dean said as she met them at the library.

"It could be an item," she breathed. "If her body was cremated, it would be the mirror she died in front of, wouldn't it?" Sitting down, she gave Sam his laptop back before booting up a library computer.

"The way Mary's choosing her victims, it seems like there's a pattern," Sam noted.

"I know, I was thinking the same thing."

"With mister Shoemaker and Jill's hit and run."

"Both had secrets where people died."

Kathrine froze from where she was typing, and slowly looked up. "But… that would make all three of us prime targets," she said, keeping her voice low as to not spook the townspeople around them. "We all told lies that got civilians killed."

"What was yours?" Dean asked, but she just hesitated. Would her secrets even apply in a world where she didn't exist? But it didn't matter anyway. Had she told Sam and Dean she was an angel before their dad died, John would be alive. Sam wouldn't have died in Cold Oak, and Dean wouldn't have taken the one year deal. So many lives could've been saved with the apocalypse having been avoided…

"If I say it isn't a secret," she said instead. She could see them share a look over the computer screen. "Mary Worthington. Murdered in Fort Wayne, Indiana. You said you found a handprint on that mirror?"

* * *

"Oh really? Ah, that's too bad Mr. Worthington. I would have paid a lot for that mirror. Okay, well maybe next time. All right, thanks." Kathrine looked up from the back seat as Sam closed the phone.

"So?"

"So that was Mary's brother. The mirror was in the family for years, until he sold it one week ago to a store called Estate Antiques. A store in Toledo."

"So wherever the mirror goes, that's where Mary goes?" Dean asked.

"Her spirit's definitely tied up with it somehow."

"Isn't there an old superstition that says mirrors can capture spirits?"

"Similar to how native Americans thought photographs steal souls, I think," she spoke up.

"When someone would die in a house people would cover up the mirrors so the ghost wouldn't get trapped."

"So Mary dies in front of a mirror, and it draws in her spirit."

Sam nodded. "Yeah, but how could she move through like a hundred different mirrors?

"I don't know, but if the mirror is the source, I say we find it and smash it."

"That'd be a lot of back luck if we end up smashing the wrong one," she warned, and Sam's phone rang.

"Hello?" He went from confused to concerned in a matter of seconds. "Charlie?"

* * *

For once, Kathrine was glad she had insisted on getting a fancier hotel this time. There were fewer reflective surfaces to cover as Sam sat next to the poor, frightened girl.

"They're all covered," she announced.

Sam nodded before looking at the teen again. "It's ok. Hey, you can open up your eyes Charlie. It's okay, all right?" Slowly, she looked up, and she… looked rough. Kathrine's mom instincts almost immediately tried to kick in, but she was too on edge. "Now listen. You're gonna stay right here on this bed, and you're not gonna look at glass, or anything else that has a reflection, okay? And as long as you do that, she cannot get you."

"But I can't keep that up forever. I'm gonna die, aren't I?"

"No. No. Not anytime soon."

Dean went to sit on the bed on her other side, while Kathrine hovered at the foot of the bed. "All right Charlie. We need to know what happened." Dean said.

"We were in the bathroom. Donna said it." She let out a slow breath.

"No, uh. Charlie, Mary, she, she picks people on certain… events that happen in your life. Was there ever an obsessed boyfriend or childhood friend?"

The teen hesitated before nodding. "Boyfriend," she whispered. "One night, we got in a fight. We broke up, and he got upset. Said he needed me, and he-he said 'Charlie, if you walk out that door right now, I'm gonna kill myself.' And you know what I said? I said 'Go ahead.' And I left. How could I say that? How could I leave him like that? I just...I didn't believe him, you know? I should have." She put her head back on her knees and cried harder.

"We'll get this sorted out," she murmured. "Just a couple more hours."

* * *

"Well, who's gonna summon her?"

"I will," both Sam and she had spoken at the same time, and it made Dean scowl.

"You know what, that's it," he pulled over, turning to both at them. He pointed to Sam first. "This is about Jessica, isn't it? You think that's your dirty little secret that you killed her somehow? Sam, this has got to stop, man. I mean, the nightmares and calling her name out in the middle of the night— it's gonna kill you. Now listen to me— It wasn't your fault. If you wanna blame something, then blame the thing that killed her. Or hell, why don't you take a swing at me? I mean I'm the one that dragged you away from her in the first place."

Sam was quiet for a second. "I don't blame you," he finally said.

"Well, you shouldn't blame yourself, because there's nothing you could've done. And you," she reared back a little as he suddenly pointed to her. "I don't know who the hell you are, and the only reason why I've been letting you stay is because you _help_. But you have to start telling us stuff, and you have to tell us now, or else you're getting out and you're hitchhiking to wherever you're going."

"Dean!" Sam hissed.

"No, Sam, he's right," she said, keeping her tone even. "And he has every right to be angry, and upset, and scared. Because I know what hell you're going to go through, and he thinks I've been selfish for not saying what's going to happen, am I right?"

"Stay out of my head," Dean growled.

"No, because you need to hear this," she snapped. "Yes, I'm keeping secrets, and God knows how many lives just one of them has taken, but that's the price of the information I carry. I'm not relevant to your lives. I'm not even supposed to exist anymore. If even one wrong person gets a hint of what I know? Everyone's dead, no ifs, ands, or buts. You want me gone? Fine, but _after_ we finish this."

He glared at her for another few seconds before turning back around and peeling back onto the road, making her close her eyes and sigh.

* * *

Sam and Dean had left her alone to go deal with the security guards, and part of her was happy that they wouldn't hear what was going to be said. "Bloody Mary. Bloody Mary." She paused, subconsciously glancing to her right, where Castiel and Jack had always hovered when she joined them on their Angel only hunts. "Bloody Mary." she lifted the crowbar, spinning in circles as she tried to look at the mirrors. "I'm here, Mary, and I've killed so many. Don't you just want to get justice on me, for everyone I've ever shot? Everyone I've stabbed? Decapitated? Let get eaten alive or torn apart? I've seen Holy Wars that span for decades, and Angelic wars that went for centuries. I've participated in them. You want the bloodiest hands on Earth? They're right here!"

She saw movement in a mirror and immediately swung the crowbar. She did it a couple more times before she was facing the original mirror, where she could see… a leviathan form of herself, grinning, bloodied, and her vision blurred as she dropped the crowbar and grabbed her head.

" _It's your fault,_ " her reflection taunted. " _You killed them. You killed them all. Sam, Dean, Cas, Bobby, John, Jess. You could have told them, warned them, said what you were. Instead, you played house and ignored the world burning around you. Ignored the angels' cries as they fought and fell. You're the reason they died! Your brothers! Your sisters! YOUR MATE! Would you let Jack die too?! Claire?! You step away when you're needed most! He's right not to trust you! He should just ki-_ "

She let out a sob as the reflection was cut off and she felt someone grabbing her arms. "Are you okay?" she forced herself to stop crying, instead looking up and seeing their horrified faces. "That's not blood-"

"It is," she cut in. "At least, it's my blood. I'm human, you've done and seen the tests. We don't know why my blood is purple rather than red." _I'd bet anything Jack's blood is purple too. Nephelim are half-human, half grace. Red and blue make purple._ Standing up with Sam's help, she all but stumbled towards the door, only stopping when they heard the glass behind them moving.

She felt her legs give out as Mary walked towards the three, Sam and Dean quickly falling as well, blood going down their face. Then, suddenly, Dean put a mirror over her face, and all she heard was ' _You killed them!_ ' before it felt like she could breathe again.

"This has got to be, like, what? 600 years of bad luck?" Dean joked, making her and Sam let out a laugh.

* * *

Sam was, for the first time since she woke up in the past, was sleeping peacefully in the backseat of the Impala, and for the first time, she sat in the passenger seat, half twisted to watch the both of them.

"Tell me everything," Dean said, making her sigh.

"You're going to have to be a bit more precise. Do you mean the beginning-beginning or the beginning of when I got people killed?" he gave her the side-eye.

"Beginning-beginning," he finally said, making her snort.

"Alright, but don't interrupt. It's a very long story." She took a deep breath and glanced out the window, towards the sky. "In the beginning, God created the heaven and the earth. And the earth was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep..."


	4. Skin

"You said you had a stepdaughter," Sam said a few weeks after the Bloody Mary case, Christmas and New Years' having passed with little fanfare.

"Yeah, Claire," she hummed, grinning a bit sadly. "I did my best to keep her away from Hunting, but life wouldn't let me,"

"Stepchildren usually means you married someone."

_Oh, right_ _,_ Kathrine blinked before turning her gaze towards the two, Dean faking a curious innocence whereas Sam just looked curious. "Yeah, his name was James."

"Was?" Dean asked.

"There… Some demons were looking for you two. They correctly thought they could get to you through me. Jimmy had gotten stabbed, protecting me. He didn't make it." She saw Dean's grip on the wheel tighten and Sam looked away. "Why are you so interested in my life before all of a sudden?"

"Usually, most cases… raising kids, it means you got out," Sam explained, making her take a sharp breath. "When?"

The silence between all three of them was thick until her voice finally cut through it. "John and I had a fight when I was 18. Things were… said. I was told to get out or get shot. So I got out. Went to school, became a nurse. Met Jimmy around mid-2004." she flicked a torn piece of leather on the back of the passenger seat, not really wanting to continue.

"Do you think you'll meet him again?" Dean's voice was guarded, but she could hear what sounded like… hope?

He had been a bit less guarded since she explained that, yes, God existed and, yes, he was a massive dick who left everyone to do everything but what he needed to do the most. She didn't really go too deep into the concept of the angels and Nephilim, but she went deep enough to throw in that seed of 'angels aren't always good and Nephilim aren't always bad'. She was also careful around the topic of why Azazel killed Mary, but that there was a reason that fed into a much larger reason that would lead them to be introduced to said angels.

"He's probably still married to his ex-wife," she murmured. "The world adapts to those who were born in it, and since I wasn't, any waves I might make won't stay."

"Do we ever meet? On a case?"

She hesitated, far too long, before finally nodding. "Yeah. You'll meet him eventually. Can… can we not talk about him anymore?"

Without waiting for an answer, she sunk down to lay down in the back seat, doing her best not to cry as she recalled crinkled blue eyes and an easy-going smile.

* * *

She came to as they pulled up into a gas station, her dream area only sending her into a bitter state as she had realized it was the neighborhood Jimmy and she had lived in, before…

Shaking her head, she glanced up as Dean spoke. "Alright, I figure we'd hit Tucumcari by lunch, then head south, hit Bisbee by midnight."

"Anything in particular?" She asked, but he shook his head. "Sam? Any objections?"

"I've been listenin', I'm just busy," he murmured, and she raised an eyebrow at the PalmPilot.

"I haven't seen that in forever," she noted. "What're the emails?"

"From my friends at Stanford."

"You're kidding." Dean scoffed. "You still keep in touch with your college buddies?"

"Why not?"

"Well, what exactly do you tell 'em? You know, about where you've been, what you've been doin'?"

"I tell 'em I'm on a road trip with my big brother and bonding with a sister we just realized we had. I tell 'em I needed some time off after Jess."

Dean hesitated, glancing over at her, making her shrug. His opinion on her stung like hell, but he was allowed to have one. "So you lie," he said. "You don't tell them about,"

"No. I just don't tell 'em….everything."

"Yeah, that's called lying. I mean, hey, man, I get it, tellin' the truth is far worse."

"So, what am I supposed to do, just cut everybody out of my life?" Dean just shrugged, while Kathrine avoided his pleading look. "You're serious?"

"You stay in close contact with civilians, they become targets," she mumbled. Amelia came to mind. She should've just left when Jimmy accepted Castiel. Sam just shook his head and went back to reading the emails.

"God…."

"What?"

"In this e-mail from this girl, Rebecca Warren, one of those friends of mine."

"Is she hot?"

"I went to school with her, and her brother, Zack. She says Zack's been charged with murder. He's been arrested for killing his girlfriend. Rebecca says he didn't do it, but it sounds like the cops have a pretty good case."

She sat straight up, eyes widening. "Do they live in St. Louis?"

"Yeah, why?" Sam looked unnerved, but she nodded, looking at Dean.

"This case made national news. You're not allowed to help _any_ during this one. I'd rather the FBI chase me than you."

"FBI?" Dean repeated. "What the hell is happening over there?"

"Shapeshifter. Takes the form of the male partners, murders the females while the guy is at work or out of town. The guy comes home at the end of the day with his prints all over the scene and body. If you do this case, it'll turn into you and torture Rebecca."

"Jesus," Sam murmured.

"You can't expect me to sit back!"

"I'm not," she said, keeping her tone even. "I'm asking. This case, it's horrible, and it starts a series of chain events that ends with mass shootings and trying to kill the president in the end. If you're not the wanted one, then things will change. Sam's a concerned friend from college who took law classes. I'm a woman who has absolutely no record. You've been in homes. You're officially in the book in about 15 states."

"Ok, I get it," the younger blonde grumbled, turning the car on. "No workin' on the case."

* * *

"Sam!" Kathrine smiled as the blonde woman opened the door and immediately hugged Sam.

"Hey, little Becky," Sam laughed.

"You know what you can do with that little Becky crap," the blonde joked, making Kathrine roll her eyes and step forward with a hesitant wave.

"I'm Kathrine,"

"She's my sister, apparently," Sam added, and the two blondes shook hands. "I got your email, and Kathrine has some expertise when it comes to, uh,"

"I was an EMT in college, and when I got my medical degree, I became part of Doctors Without Borders," she explained, and it was true, for the most part. While she had been a trauma nurse in the first go-around, she joined the group in hopes of making a difference without stepping forward into the limelight. "I've seen some pretty nasty stuff, and I want to help, anyway I can."

Sam's friend nodded, stepping back. "Come in, please," Letting Sam go first, she shut the door behind them. "I decided to take the semester off. I'm gonna stay until Zack's free," she was saying to Sam.

"Where are your folks?"

"They live in Paris for half the year, so they're on their way home now for the trial." They walked into the kitchen, and Rebecca hesitated. "Do you want a beer or some wine or something?"

"I'm-I'm trying not to drink," she said, unsure how to explain only the mass amount of all the liquor stores in Kansas and Oklahoma combined could get her drunk. "If… you don't mind, what happened, exactly?"

"Well, um, Zack came home, and he found Emily tied to a chair. And she was beaten up and bloody, and she wasn't breathing." She started to cry as she shook her head and grabbed a kleenex. "So, he called 911, and the police— they showed up, and they arrested him. But, the thing is, the only way that Zack could've killed Emily is if he was in two places at the same time. The police— they have a video. It's from the security tape from across the street. And it shows Zack coming home at 10:30. Now, Emily was killed just after that, but I swear, he was here with me, having a few beers until at least after midnight."

"Does the house have any security cameras?" she asked. "Big, nice place like this, gotta have something…"

"It's just a night vision one," she admitted. "No audio, but you can see his face. Police wouldn't even look at it or take it in."

"We'll talk to them," Sam promised. "Bec, look, I know Zack didn't do this. Me, Dean, Kathrine, we're going to solve this."

* * *

"Well?" Dean demanded as they walked into the motel room.

"Definitely a shapeshifter," Sam said. "Police won't be able to capture it, and they're ignoring evidence."

"Except I have a trump card," she said. "A slightly illegal trump card, but still, if I play it right, we'll have one of the best BAU teams backing us up."

"BAU? You're purposefully baiting the feds?"

"Just a few hints here and there. A serial killer in St. Louis that can survive bullets to the head. Innocent men locked away with police officers purposefully ignoring evidence."

"Make the force look corrupt, then when they take over, what, you just tell them it's a shapeshifter?" Sam asked.

"Not in so many words. There's a genius on the team, he's a nerd who likes folklore stuff. Just a few symbols here and there in the crime scenes, enough to get his attention. I'll have to find a way to replace their bullets with silver, or at least have them silver-lined, but the hardest part is not actually getting tagged in the case."

* * *

_"Agent Jareau speaking,"_

_"There's a serial killer in St. Louis. He makes himself look like the male partners, torturing the women, and then manages to shift the blame to the actual partners. The police aren't doing anything."_

_"Ma'am, there are proper channels to get a case through-"_

_"What if it were your leader. Oh, what's his name again? Ah, yes, Aaron Hotchner. And his wife, Haley? They have a son, don't they? This man, he'd kill them both, if it meant getting the satisfaction of framing an FBI agent."_

_"Who the hell are you?"_

_"If you want to know that, Jennifer, you'll have to come and get me. I'll be waiting in St. Louis. Don't disappoint me."_

* * *

"I feel disgusting," she announced as she painted one of the three shapeshifter symbols they had decided on.

"Because you're in a crime scene?"

"Because I practically blackmailed a woman I had come to see as a sister," she corrected. "Using the team boss of all people. They don't take well to one of their own being threatened, and having a potential stalker, practically giving their location, as well as a high risk, corruption case? They'd be fools not to come."

"How long do they usually take?"

"Well, it depends on how many bodies have dropped. A couple, spaced out? A week or two. Three in the span of a week? They'll be here in two, three days max."

"If we can find the liar, we can leave breadcrumbs," Sam murmured as she finished touching up. "You think they'll be able to handle a case like this?"

"They have to," she said, darkly, recalling the many breaking news announcements, telling the horrifying tales of how the Leviathans who got Sam's and Dean's went on killing spree after killing spree. She had been hounded and eventually had agents watching her 24/7 until they were 'taken care of'."

Sam let out a hum, and as they went to exit through the back door, she paused. "What is it?" Sam asked, and she just pointed to the pole. "Someone came this way."

"Now we know how the shapeshifter left, at least," she noted as an ambulance whizzed past them. "You wanna check that out?"

* * *

"I hate the sewers," she grumbled as she stepped off the final ring and clicked on her flashlight.

"Check this out," glancing towards where Sam was pointing to and grimaced. "He's using the sewer system to move. Could this be from a victim?"

She looked at him, wondering if he had forgotten before realization came over her. "This is your first time dealing with one," she murmured. "No, when a Shapeshifter is finished with a form, it sheds the borrowed skin and flesh. If we were to do a test, it would come back as the guy they hauled off."

"That is sick," he mumbled, and she nodded.

"We should go back to the hotel, tell Dean what we've found. And maybe paint another shifter symbol on the manholes."

* * *

"So how do we gank the son of a bitch?" Dean asked once they had explained what they found.

"Silver bullet to the heart, but we can't," she said. "I know that it needs to be stopped, but if it captures one of us, it'll go after Rebecca, and if it chooses one of you two to wear your skin, it will be a nationwide manhunt that lasts for years."

"It can't be that bad," Dean scoffed.

"It ends with you two being arrested for mass murders and attempted assassination of the president of the united states! I had to fake your deaths to get you out and even then it drained me for weeks after!" She all but shrieked. "You two used me as your own damn personal taxi without even thanks for saving your asses, or even a 'are you ok' when I almost died from the strain! When Cas _did_ die from the strain! So yes, it is that fucking bad!"

Everything was quiet as she balled her fists at her side. How long had she been forced to keep that to herself? How long did she have to stay up so Jack wasn't alone with them, so he wouldn't be forced to feel the strain too? Cas and she had never seen eye to eye, but their love for the Nephilim had been the one thing they agreed on; Jack was not to be left alone with Sam and Dean.

And now he was, and Cas would be searching for her as well with half power, and none of them had ever _asked…_

She had to kill her brother, for God's sake, and they didn't even bat an eye when she had ran Michael through.

"We won't do that," Sam's voice cut through her thoughts, and distantly, she was aware of how much she was crying as she looked at him. He wasn't looking anywhere at her.

"No," Dean murmured as well. "No, we won't."

* * *

Someone was knocking on the door.

Curious, the blonde stood up and went downstairs. When she opened it, she blinked before looking around. "Oh, hi," she said, awkwardly.

Kathrine grinned back, looking sheepish. "Sam kicked me out," she said. "Said that he… he was done, pretending I was his sister."

"Oh, that's…" Rebecca trailed off, trying to say that it didn't sound like him, but when she thought on it… he never had said anything good about his family, had he? "Do you want to come in and talk about it?"

Kathrine grinned. "I'd like that." As Rebecca turned around, she missed the silver hue of the other blonde's eyes. As they moved into the living room, she poured some wine, handing a glass to her and watching as she drank it. "Sam thinks there's this creature, it can become anyone it wants. He thinks it became Zack."

* * *

"What'd you call it?" She asked, a bit wary, making Kathrine frown.

"A shapeshifter," she replied, making her let out a laugh. "Yeah, maybe we're crazy. But what if we're not? I mean, look, you said it yourself that Zack was in two places at once. Now, tell me how that can happen."

The younger blonde nodded. "Okay, so, this thing— it can make itself look like anybody?"

"That's right,"

"Well, what is it, like a genetic freak?" Kathrine let out a laugh that sent a shiver down Rebecca's spine.

"Maybe. Evolution is about mutation, right? So, maybe this thing was born human but was different. Hideous and hated. Until he learned to become someone else." Rebecca couldn't help but glance over towards the kitchen, the back door, and as she turned, she once again missed the silver eyes. "It's funny. I kind of understand him. He's all alone— close to no one. All he wants is for someone to love him. He's like me." If anything, the blonde looked ready to run at any second. "You know, everybody needs a little human touch now and then. It's so hard to be different." Kathrine reached forward, but Rebecca flinched away before she could touch her hair.

"You should go," she said, but Kathrine leaned forward.

"Do you want to know what really happened to them all?"

Leaning back, her dark grin grew wider as Rebecca's jaw dropped. "You are disgusting, just get the hell out of here!"

"You really should've seen the signs," Kathrine purred instead, standing up in time with Rebecca. "I don't take female forms often, but this one? This one _sings_ of power. I'll quite enjoy having my little one-on-one with dearest Kathrine once I'm finished here."

* * *

Kathrine paced from where she was waiting in the hospital hallway. Dean, Sam, and her had been ambushed when they went to go paint the manhole covers, and the two men had stab wounds, a broken leg, and a broken arm between them, whereas she escaped with cuts along her thighs, upper arms, and a patch of skin carved from her back.

Finally, one of the nurses came out. "The taller one, Sam, is awake and asking for you, Miss Winchester," she said, making the blonde quickly thank her and go into the room.

"Thank god," she breathed. "I didn't expect it to be waiting to ambush us! I just saw your arm and the blood-"

"I'll be fine," Sam interrupted with a pained grin. "Dean?" She nodded to the man in the other bed, who was still out.

"He hasn't woken up yet, but he'll probably complain about the leg." Sam let out a grunt, and she hesitated before pulling out Dean's cell. "You should call D-John. He needs to know you two got hurt bad enough to go into a hospital."

"I'm not exactly on speaking terms," he protested.

"And Dean's out for the count," she argued.

"Why don't you call him? He'll find out eventually," she blinked before looking away. Did she… did she want John to know about her? With Jack looking for a way to bring her back to her world? Who's to say she wouldn't just up and vanish before she even saw John again?

Sighing, she conceded defeat and pressed the speed dial 2. " _This is John Winchester. I can't be reached. If this is an emergency, call my son Dean 866-907-3235. He can help._ "

"Uh, Mister Winchester, this is… this is Kathrine Novak. I'm calling because I was hunting with your sons, and we got ambushed by a shapeshifter.. Sam has a broken arm, and Dean a broken leg. And they were both stabbed a couple of times. They'll be ok, but… you need to talk to them, Winchester. Before it's too late." Hanging up, she ignored Sam's curious look, instead moving to sit between them. "Immediate family can ignore visiting hours," she murmured. "With the shifter most likely disguised as me, I need to stay in a high populated area where everyone can see where I am."

* * *

Kathrine pulled her hood over her head as Sam and Dean watched the news, unsure if she wanted to laugh or cry at their gobsmacked expressions. " _An anonymous tip led police to a home in the Central West End, where a S.W.A.T team discovered a local woman bound and gagged. Her attacker, a white female, approximately twenty-six to thirty years of age, was discovered hiding in her home._ "

A sketch of her face came up, and it just looked so young, she snorted. "That's not even a good picture," Dean agreed. "You have Dad's nose." She blinked, looking at him with wide eyes, but then, the door opened, making her tense up.

A few seconds later, she wanted to curse as Morgan and Reid came in, both pulling guns at the sight of her.

* * *

She knew Reid could tell something wasn't right when the first thing she did when she was sat down in the interrogation room was take off her jacket and button up to reveal very obvious stab wounds instead of gunshot wounds.

After about ten minutes, Hotchner and Greenaway (someone she only knew from stories) came in, settling down across from her.

"Where were you last night around 10:39 pm?"

"In the hospital, where I had been for a few hours. I had gotten jumped when I was leaving my motel room to get food. Some guy sliced up my arms and legs pretty deep. Had to get stitches while my brothers got stabbed and bones were broken."

She kept her gaze even as she stared at the two. She did nothing wrong, and like hell would she play into their traps. "How, exactly, do you know Rebecca Warren?"

"Sam, my youngest brother, introduced me to her a couple days ago. When he heard her brother had been wrongfully arrested for a murder he didn't commit, he offered to come up and help with everything. Since he was on a sibling trip with Dean and me, we decided to all come."

They continued the back and forth, the agents trying to get her into a corner, and Kathrine always answering truthfully to get away from the walls.

"What do you mean, Zach Warren was wrongfully arrested?" Greenaway finally asked, making her tilt her head towards her.

"The Warren house has security cameras. The night his girlfriend was murdered, he was with Rebecca. The police refused to accept the footage, saying it was a clean-cut case, just like I know they'll do the same with me. I was in that hospital all night. Whoever those policemen shot, _it_ _wasn't me_ _._ "

* * *

About an hour later, some old man in an ill-fitting suit came in. "Right, here's what we're going to do. You're going to take the plea deal, and you won't complain about it."

"Get out," she snapped.

"Young lady, I am your lawyer, though you don't deserve-"

" _I said get out!_ " she snarled. "I have been, in a span of 24 hours, stabbed, had an unwilling biopsy done, knocked out, been stuck in a hospital overnight worrying, arrested for a crime I didn't commit, and now, to fucking top it off, I have some crusty ass lawyer trying to tell me what he thinks I should do! You're probably just as corrupt as half of the people here, so get out. I don't need a public defender."

The man's face was an ugly shade of purple as he sputtered before storming out, leaving her to put her head in her hands and groan. "You've got a temper," Morgan's voice commented, making her glance up from under her fingers.

_Please say that's for me_ , she mentally begged. She hadn't eaten much due to the stress of the case, and it was getting to her now. Instead, however, she slipped a mask on and smiled. "Can I help you, agent?"

"Figured you could use some food." he shrugged, and she hesitantly took the bag. "Your story about getting attacked and staying in the hospital checks out, but there's one thing that doesn't make sense."

She froze from where she had been unwrapping the sandwich, hesitantly looking at him. "I told you everything I could," she began.

"Miss, Kathrine Winchester was stillborn. Why are you claiming to be her?"

She was distantly aware of the sandwich falling into the table as she stared at him. She knew, of course, that without Jophiel getting permission from John and Mary to be their daughter, that Kathrine would've been stillborn, having no soul to help the newborn body to properly function until it turned 3, but… "I… we took DNA tests when I first met Sam and Dean. I-I heard stories of them, growing up, but they hadn't of me, so they were suspicious, and we did a test."

"Where was this at?"

She listed off the hospital she had been taken to after the plane crash and watched as he left, leaving her to pick at the sandwich, no longer feeling hungry.

At least now she knew how John would react if he ever saw her.

* * *

"Do you recognize this symbol?"

She blinked as Reid placed down the shifter symbol; the one she had left on the wall and manhole of Zach's place. "That's, uh… Norse?"

"It's a symbol, most commonly used in the explanation of the legend of a shapeshifter."

"Like, someone who can make themselves seem like someone else?" She hated playing dumb. "I might've heard a few stories about stuff like that. Why are you asking me this?"

He was looking at the photo before leaving, not answering her.

* * *

About 10 hours after her initial arrest, she was allowed to go, and she quickly went back to the hotel, where Sam and Dean were respectively on a couch and bed. "Sup fuckers," she greeted.

"You escaped?" Dean asked, but she shook her head.

"No, they released me. Our context clues might have worked a bit too much. I think they think I'm a shapeshifter myself."

"Why's that?" she hesitated at Sam's question.

"It doesn't matter now," she said instead. "What did I miss?"

* * *

She went into the sewers once they had caught her up on everything that had happened.

She didn't expect to see the BAU team in the sewers, but they caught sight of her before she could vanish, which meant guns were pulled on her the second time that day.

"What are you?" Hotchner demanded.

"Not the creature you're looking for," she answered. "Besides, regular bullets can't kill a shapeshifter. You'd need these," she lifted a silver bullet up.

"Why'd you say you didn't know what that symbol was?"

"Well, _usually_ _,_ when a hunter gets caught by feds or police, they aren't believed when they tell the truth, so we act dumb. Sometimes it can get us out in time to save more lives," she shrugged. "I suggest you take your team back topside, Agent Hotchner. I'd rather not get shot when I fight my duplicate if it hasn't shifted out already."

"Morgan, take her topside," the man in question said instead, making her sigh, and the second he grabbed her arm, her hand was on his.

" _Sleep_ _,_ " she ordered, and the man dropped like a stone before looking at the others. " _You were attacked by a strange creature that seemed to be shifting between your faces. It chose Agent Morgan's and knocked him out before you were able to shoot it in the heart with a silver bullet. You never saw me down here._ "

As soon as they turned the corner, she sagged against the wall, pressing the back of her right hand to her nose, not all surprised to feel blood trickling down. Suggestions were never her strong suit, especially with how her power was… well, it was certainly more chaotic than before.

* * *

The next day, she collapsed in the back of the Impala while Sam and Rebecca talked.

"Well?" Dean asked from the passenger seat.

"Officially ganked," she murmured. "Remind me when I wake up to heal you and Sam. Used too much mojo getting the agents out of the sewers."

"Heal me?" Dean echoed. "What're you talking about?"

But Kathrine was already asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly hadn't planned on even having the Criminal Minds crew come in, but I've always entertained the idea of an FBI branch called SIS (Supernatural Investigation Services)


	5. Hook Man | When the Past Haunts

She was on the docks again, but this time, instead of Jack beside her, it was Jimmy.

She knew it was Jimmy and not Cas because she couldn't see any signs of the angel's grace. So, she sat there, staring at him, unsure of what to say. He had his eyes closed, and he seemed to be… not quite there? After what felt like hours, he finally opened his eyes and looked at her.

"Kathrine?" he murmured. She nodded and found herself in a hug, which she quickly responded to. "Where are you? I've been looking all over."

"What?" she asked, pulling away to look at him. "Did… did Jack not tell you? He would've told you what happened when he sent you into my dreams." He should've, anyway. If he didn't, she was going to remind him about manners again.

"Jack?" Jimmy asked. "Who is that?"

"Jack… my nephew? The kid Cas and I agreed to split custody over?" The man's brows furrowed, and he shook his head. "Blonde, about yay high? Looks 15, but acts like he's 5 sometimes?"

"No," he murmured. "What about Claire?"

"Ran away during the havoc when all of Heaven fell. Jody adopted her before I could tell her she's mine." she shrugged, trying to ignore how it still stung. He stepped away, shaking his head.

"Kathrine, none of this makes sense," he said, and she tilted her head as he continued. "I remember pleading with Castiel to use me as a vessel instead of Claire, and then the next minute, I'm waking up in bed next to Amelia, and she thinks we're still married? And it's 2006? Where are you?"

She just stared at him before she slowly stood up. "James," she breathed. "What is the date? The exact date?"

"January 20th. 2006,"

* * *

The second her eyes were open, she flared her grace, searching, feeling…

She retracted her grace almost as soon as she realized what she was doing, glancing at the two sleeping brothers in the front seat. It had only been a few hours since she had killed the skinwalker, so she reached forward and gently pressed a hand to each of their foreheads, dismissing the casts as the bones healed. After waiting a couple more minutes, she extended her wings as best as she could and did the one thing she had sworn she'd never do.

She flew.

It was rough, and she might've hit a bird or two, but she landed in Pontiac, in a familiar church, where a familiar figure was in a pew, head bowed.

"That won't work," she said, making him jump and turn around, his hopeful face going to one of horror as he no doubt saw the purple blood staining white feathers. "I'm officially cut off from Heaven. Any prayers directed at me won't go to me."

"Kathy, what happened?" he stepped forward and gently grabbed her arms.

"God," she replied, trying not to sound too bitter. "He erased me from existence in my, _our_ world. I ended up here. I'm not sure how you came here also, let alone even remember, but… Jimmy, I don't exist here. Jophiel, she couldn't be made, somehow, and it led to Kathrine being stillborn."

There was a range of emotions on his face before it settled on one; Determination. "Do they know who you are?"

"They know I'm Kathrine Winchester, but they don't know that I technically died. They… don't know I'm Jophiel either." She admitted. "I don't know what to do."

" _We'll_ figure it out," he corrected. "I'm staying with you."

She shook her head, shaking his hands off and stepping back. "You're married to Amelia. You have custody of Claire! It…" she trailed off, eyes going up to the stained glass. In their world, it had been one of her murals, with the supposed weapon that could stop even God Himself. But now? Now it was of Raphael. All it did was remind her of what she had done. "It was a mistake, coming here."

She turned around, ignoring how everything screamed for her to stop.

* * *

She landed somewhere in Iowa, on her hands and knees in some forest clearing. She hadn't eaten anything, but she still dry heaved, and after a couple of minutes, she sat up with a shaky breath.

"Y'know, you really shouldn't be down here,"

She was up and around in a second, blade in hand as she stared down… Loki? Or Gabriel? Her mind was hazing with pain, anger, and grief, and she did _not_ want bullshit today. "What do you want," she snarled.

"Why are you on Earth? You're not part of the garrisons assigned to Earth," he shot back.

"Funny, how a _pagan god_ knows about the garrisons of the angels," she taunted, making him freeze. "I'm not putting up with any bullshit today, so I suggest you _leave_. Now."

He didn't, instead staying where he was, but she could feel his aura leaking through. "Who are you?" His tone was gentler and reminded her of when she was a fledgling, and how he was the only one who hadn't grown cold.

"I-I don't," her hands shook and her knees felt like they were going to give up. "Just _go_." The silence seemed to stretch on forever until he backed away, and when she blinked, he was gone.

* * *

" _Is this Bobby Singer?_ "

" _Maybe. Who's speaking?_ "

" _Jimmy Novak. I'm looking for Sam and Dean. They've been hunting with… with someone, I need to talk to. Please, I'll do all the tests, I just need to talk to them._ "

" _I wasn't aware Sam was hunting again. Tell you what, I'll call, and if they confirm they're with this friend of yours, I'll do a meetup. If you're lying to me, I'll assume you're a demon, and then we got problems, understood?_ "

" _Understood. Her name is Kathrine. She's blonde, about 5'10 with these blue eyes that just pierce into your soul. And a tattoo on her right wrist, a heart with two arrows through it._ "

* * *

" _Bobby?_ "

" _Dean, got a call asking about you earlier. Asked for you and Sam._ "

" _Sammy, uh, he's hunting again. Girlfriend ended up like Mom. Who asked for us? Was it dad?_ "

" _Someone called Jimmy Novak. Asked cause you're apparently traveling with a girl called Kathrine? Blonde hair, blue eyes, tattoo on the wrist?_ "

" _We were. When we woke up, she was gone, no note. Weirdest thing, before she fell asleep, she said to_ 'remind me to heal you' _and that she_ 'used too much mojo'. _Our casts were gone, bones completely healed._ "

" _Think she might be some kind of monster?_ "

" _Hell, if she is, she's nothing we've never met before… Bobby, she had us do a DNA test, to prove who she was._ "

" _And? Who is she?_ "

" _She's our sister. Our older sister, who we knew nothing about. Now she just up and left._ "

" _Balls. Think this Jimmy might know where she went to?_ "

" _Might. She told us about herself. Apparently, she's married to dude called Jimmy. Could be the same guy._ "

" _Tell you what, there's a case over in Ankeny, Iowa. I'll tell him to meet you up over there._ "

" _Thanks, Bobby._ "

" _Just call sometime, you idjit,_ "

* * *

Dean wasn't sure what he was expecting as he pulled up to the address Bobby had given him, but he certainly wasn't expecting some… _tax accountant_ to be waiting.

"What the hell is he wearing?" He muttered. Sam gave him Bitch Face #15 as he got out and headed towards the man.

"Jimmy Novak?" He asked, and Dean saw how his face shifted between confusion and realization.

"First time meeting, right," he heard him say as he walked up. "Yes. Where's Kathy?"

"She's gone," he said. "Any idea where she might've gone to?"

"If I had to guess? Indiana." He narrowed his eyes.

"Do you know what she is?"

Jimmy hesitated. "No."

_He knows_ , he thought, sharing a look with Sam. "Well, that's freaking great," he grumbled. "C'mon Sammy. Let's get this case and then find her." As they turned to walk off, he mentally counted down from 5.

"Wait!" As he turned, he was genuinely surprised to see the desperation on Novak's face. "Let me join you. Teach me how to hunt. I've lost her twice now. I don't want it to happen again, _please_ _._ "

He didn't have to turn to Sam to know what face he was wearing, so he just grabbed his arm and drugged him off to the side. "Dude, no, we are not training a civilian to hunt."

"If we don't, he'll try to teach himself," Sam hissed back. "Besides, you want answers, don't you? You saw how he hesitated when you asked what she was. She trusts him enough to know. We gain his trust, he'll slip up and tell us."

"Yeah, and then what? If she comes back, we gank her? Who knows what he'd do in retaliation."

Sam paused. " _If_? You sound like you don't want her to come back."

"Damnit, Sammy, think about it. She keeps claiming to be our sister, and now she's some-some freak species we've never met before? And even if she's telling the truth, how much longer until she goes full Jolly Jane on our asses? We'd have to put down our own sister."

"She'd kill herself before doing that," Sam argued, and as much as Dean wanted to argue, from what little he'd seen, his baby brother had a point. "Look, we can either train him and use him as a way to find her before something happens, or we can send him to Bobby and try finding her alone." They both turned to the pacing man, who kept glancing up at the sky similar to how Kathrine did. "We can't just leave him like this. He's too open for demonic possession."

Without saying anything else, he started walking, stopping in front of the other man. "I'm only going to say this once. You do what I say when I say, or else you can just forget about hunting ever again, got it?"

He didn't give the man a chance to answer as he started walking towards the Frat house.

* * *

She stayed in the clearing for the next few days, trying to figure out where her life had gone. She hadn't even noticed when it started to rain until someone sat beside her with an extra-large umbrella covering them.

"You'll make your vessel sick if you stay out here too long,"

It was Gabriel, again. She slowly looked up. "If I were to ever leave my vessel, it would immediately die. There's no human soul in here."

"How'd you get consent to go in then?"

"I asked the parents if I could be their daughter."

His amber gazed flickered between her face and wings, no doubt counting how many she had. "And D-God was ok with an Archangel, one of the Leaders, falling?"

"He encouraged it," she muttered. "Someone got the drop on me and He couldn't heal me. Told me to Fall until He could find a way."

"Which one are you then? Sariel? Cassiel? Ramiel?" Gabriel paused before chuckling. "He sure likes the Iels, doesn't He?"

"Well, there's Michael, Raphael, and Helel," she jokingly said, but it sounded flat, especially as he stiffened. "No, uh. I don't… I don't exist, in this world. We don't know why. God, he tried making me here, I can still feel the ripple effects, but something in the process failed."

"Jophiel," he breathed. "He was going to call-"

"You know," she interrupted. "If I weren't from the future, you would've just given yourself away," he stiffed, eyes going wide. "Yeah, I'm Jophiel, Dana, whoever the fuck you want to call me. God, he… he killed the world I was in. Tried to erase me. Something happened and he sent me over here instead."

"The Apocalypse?" He asked, and she shrugged.

"Which one? We, Sam, Dean, Castiel, and I, we adverted all of them. Granted, I wasn't there for the first two, but still." She leaned back against the rock and watched his expression. "Are you still going to tell me off for sitting out here?"

"Wouldn't be a good brother if I didn't," he finally said. "So you cozied up to Dumb and Dumber?"

"Ah, about that," she grinned and motioned to her body. "Hi, I'm Kathrine Winchester, the older sister of Sam and Dean."

* * *

Jimmy Novak was many things.

He was a devout worshiper. He was a father, husband, ex-husband, and vessel for an angel of the Lord. He used to work 9 to 5 as a consultant, and the day he said yes to Castiel, he had wanted to help make a difference in the world. That, in the end, got Amelia and Kathrine killed.

In short, he knew what it was like to question faith and beg for forgiveness, so when Dean started to go back, and Sam started walking towards Lori, he stopped her. "Let me," he murmured. As he walked forward, he made sure to keep his footsteps heard. "Lori?"

"I- What're you doing here?" she asked, and he sat beside her in the pew.

"I know what it's like, to question and beg for forgiveness," he said. "That's what you were doing, right?" The girl hesitated before nodding.

"I'm to blame for all of this," she said. "I've read in the Bible about avenging angels."

_Do you trust me? Do you still love me?_

_Do you wish to be a part of something greater?_

_I don't want you to go._

"Whatever this guy is, he's no angel," he said. "I know angels. Only one is avenging and caring, and she was thrown out of Heaven. The others are cold and cruel. They don't care for humanity, not unless it's in their best interest to."

"You… you're speaking from experience?"

"You could say. Whatever this thing is, this… spirit, it's feeding off feelings, of needing to be punished. It's not your fault these things are happening, Lori."

"It is!" She snapped. "I don't know how, but it is. I killed Rich. Taylor too. I nearly killed my father."

"Lori, that's not-"

"I can see it now. They didn't deserve to be punished. I do."

There was a noise at the altar as the candles blew out. He stood, the hairs on his neck rising. "We have to go," he whispered. "Now, we have to go now!"

* * *

The pain on her shoulder was too much to ignore. Her human body wasn't in pain, but when she had to have Gabriel search her grace…

In his words, it was more shredded than a circus trainer when the tigers get loose.

Part of her wondered if he had experience seeing that, or if he just got an idea to do it.

In any case, he did his best to patch her up, and as he did so, she let him see the extent of what Uriel had done to her. Not that she said Uriel did it, but he read through the lines.

"I'm no Raphie," he said. "But it shouldn't still be bleeding after, what, 700 years?"

"Cursed," she muttered. "Runes on the blade. It'll heal once I agree to the cause."

_Kathrine!_

Blinking, she glanced up. "What was that?"

"One of your prayers," he replied. "Pops made it to where I'd get any prayers to Johpiel since I was there when," he stopped but shook his head. "It was quiet until about a month ago. A devout, married man, Jimmy Novak, started praying out of the blue, begging you to come home."

"He came from the other world too," she murmured. "That world, Amelia and him divorced. Met me as Kathy in 2004. Got married in 2008. Became Castiel's vessel about four months later."

"Ouch," he noted. "Because you died young, that ripple didn't happen, so him and… Amelia? They stayed married?" she nodded. "She thinks you're a homewrecker."

"I'd rather die," she instantly said. "That's the whole reason why I left him once I realized what had happened. He deserves a normal life for however long he can get. Hell, he's not even supposed to know that I'm… or about Sam or Dean."

_Kathrine, please, come back._

"Sounds desperate," he noted, making her scrunch up her nose.

"You're really going to act as a translator?" she asked. "Because I know sometimes the prayers can get, uh, _difficult_ to hear."

"Sometimes they're the best ones to hear," he grinned, making her roll her eyes and push him away. "No flying on your wings. I've just realigned over half of them between the cuts and they need to set before you do anything."

"Yes, mother, anything else?" She mocked, rolling her eyes. "I planned on finding a payphone and calling Dean."

"I'll do you one better," before she could react, he snapped his fingers, and she was suddenly in front of Sam and Dean…

And had about five bullets in her chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you know that "Jolly Jane" was a nickname for one of America's female serial killers? Jane Toppan was a nurse who went on a killing spree that started with her family friends and by the end had thirty-one victims. She would kill the victims with different combinations of medicine and chemicals and even climb into bed with them after administering the dose. She was found not guilty by reason of insanity and committed to the Taunton Insane Hospital for life.


	6. Consequences

She blinked down at the purple blood slowly leaking through her shirt and sighed, forcing her arms to move and brush down herself, as if to remove dust. As her hands passed over her wounds, they healed, expelling the bullets and making them drop to the floor.

"Right, so you two can thank one of my other brothers for that," she said in a clipped tone. "I'll replace the bullets lost so long as you promise not to do that again."

"What the hell are you?" Dean grounded out, not lowering his gun, unlike Sam, who had dropped his the second he realized who he had shot.

"We talked about this already Dean," she made sure to keep her gaze on either Sam or Dean because if she even looked to the left a little, she'd breakdown again. His gun lowered slightly, but not all the way, making her sigh. "I can't do the parlor trick Cas did before. I'm technically under bed rest."

"What do you mean, bedrest?" Jimmy demanded, but she clenched her jaw and didn't answer.

"If they existed, we would've seen or heard about one by now," Dean shot back, making her pinch the bridge of her nose.

"Jesus, why are you choosing _now_ of all times to be difficult?"

"What- What's happening?" Sam demanded.

"Well, I was talking to someone and he decided to send me back here because of… reasons. I'm not sure how much Dean just told you, but you know how Demons exist?" Sam nodded, looking unsure at how sharp her tone was. "So do angels, just, in a lesser degree of showing up. Heaven is on lockdown, and I don't want them realizing what I am, so I'm trying to keep it on the down-low."

"Angels? You're saying you're an _angel_?"

She blinked at his tone before- right, Sam was still a big believer. He was until he met Cas. "While I'm tied to this vessel, I'm closer to a Nephilim, but yes, I'm an angel. My true name is Jophiel, but I doubt you'd find me in any book. Gabriel told me why I don't exist in this world."

"The Book of Enoch talks of Nephilim," Jimmy spoke up again, making her ball up her fists. "They're… the products of-"

"I advise you be quiet," she snapped. "Enoch got a lot of things wrong and we both know it. Stupid man would only listen to maybe about a quarter of what Gabriel said."

"Right, for the rest of the class," she glanced over and saw that Dean had lowered his gun and sat down. "What the hell is a Nephilim? Because all you said was half-angel."

"That's one way of being one," she answered. "The other is to Fall, become human, and then recover your grace. It's the equivalent of a human's soul. I was encouraged to fall when I got seriously injured. I bounced from life to life, and in 1976, I asked John and Mary if I could be their daughter. They thought I was some crazy old lady, so they said yes. 9 months later, I was born. About eight years after that, I found and recovered my grace."

"So, you, what, fly around on little wings and a halo and make people fall in love?" Dean joked, but she grimaced. "I was joking, don't tell me you actually-"

"I was in charge of the Cherubim while I was fully powered," she admitted. "I didn't make people fall in love, but the paperwork from that department gives me nightmares _still_ _._ "

"There's angelic _paperwork_?" Sam asked in disbelief.

"We are a type of government," she reminded him. "We're, at least, a military force. Because I was an archangel, I got put in charge. I think some of the stacks when I left were taller than me, and that's saying something."

"That's how you healed us," Sam guessed. "And left without us realizing."

"I used a lot of my powers a week ago, it made me sloppy. And then with the married man over there being from my dimension, I had to make sure there weren't any other cracks. A demon from 2020 in 2006 is begging for trouble."

" _2020_?" Jimmy murmured as Dean glanced between the two and said "Married?"

"To Amelia. He probably up and left, without a word," she scowled at him. "Dick move, by the way. You're going to Pontiac as soon as…" she paused, glancing around. "Where are we?"

"Oasis Plains, Oklahoma," Sam said. "It's March 24th."

Wait a minute…

"I've been gone for two months?!" She yelled. _Gabriel, what the fuck! Two months! I was supposed to be back a couple days after I left! I missed Dean's birthday!_

"Well, you're back now," Dean grunted, and her anxiety spiked a little, seeing how calm he was.

Shaking her head, she moved out of the empty living room and up the stairs.

She couldn't deal with Winchester Bullshit today.

* * *

In the end, she kept the radio scanner quiet Sam wouldn't wake up. Not that she'd ever admit to calming his dreams if he asked, but he was running himself haggard still. As she listened to the details, she sighed and gently shook him.

"Sam, wake up. There's been another death, a woman named Lydia." when he grumbled and sat up, she went upstairs, rolling her eyes as she knocked on the bathroom door. "Dean? The scanner picked something up. Someone in Oasis died last night."

" _This shower is awesome_ ," Dean called, making her let out a loose laugh, though it died out as she hesitated outside the last door. She heard the bathroom door open and Dean stepped out. "What's the hold-up?"

She turned to him with a frown, hugging herself. "He's married, Dean. It doesn't matter if his memories say otherwise. I was there when the laws of marriage were written. It's the one law I'd always keep, and always will keep."

"So they just separated now, big deal,"

"No, you don't understand. It was because of _me_ ," he looked a bit uncomfortable, so she just shook her head. "Never mind, just… forget I said anything. Go get dressed." Once he was in the room he had chosen, she slowly opened the door to where Jimmy was. He paused from where he was buttoning up a shirt, making her clear her throat and glance away. "Someone died last night. We're going to check it out."

"Kathy,"

"No, Jimmy. We have nothing to talk about that isn't this case."

* * *

Since she hadn't been seen around, she decided to immediately go into the house, where she saw the bodyline on the carpet in the master bedroom. Seeing a towel on the floor, she moved to grab it and just barely stopped herself from screaming as dozens of dead spiders fell from it.

A few seconds later, the other three came in to see her furiously wiping her hands. "Spiders?" Jimmy guessed.

"Shut," she groused, but he just laughed.

"Kathy hates spiders even though she made them."

"I thought they'd stop me when I put it on the table! Instead, Ramiel fucking loved them!" she protested.

"Think these could be from Spider Boy?" Dean asked Sam, who shrugged.

"Matt? Maybe."

"Right, we'll talk to him, you two," he pointed to her and Jimmy, "sort your shit out."

She gaped at him as they left, unsure of what to say as the man glanced over at her. "That… bastard," she muttered.

"Kathrine, he has a point," Jimmy said, stepping in front of the door so she couldn't leave. "We're going to be in a car with each other for who knows how long, and I don't want us to fight anymore."

"Jimmy, you know who I am. _What_ I am. As Jophiel, I helped judge the souls entering Heaven. For the longest of times, adultery was a sin. Hell, currently, it still is! So whatever hopeful fantasy you have, stop it, right now, because it's not going to happen, got it? Not until you go to Amelia and tell her the truth, and _she's_ the one to leave _you_."

"And if she doesn't?" He asked, staring at her until she met his eyes. "If she wants to hunt?"

"Then you stay with her. I might be a fallen, Jimmy, but I do my best not to be a hypocrite. If she stays, you stay with her."

He looked so… it made her heart twist, but she forced those feelings down. She would not be a homewrecker. She would _not_. "And if she leaves?" he whispered.

"Then we wait three months. If you still want to do this, then we'll try again." He hesitated before nodding, stepping to the side, but before she left the room, she glanced back at him.

He was looking at the tiled floor, hands clenched into fists… but he was _there_ …

"Jimmy?" He glanced up at her, and she smiled. "I'm glad you're here."

* * *

Dean and Sam had found old bones, Native American bones, and she wished she could remember if they had said anything about it before. She and Jimmy agreed to stay behind and talk to the neighbors a little. From what Sam had told her, they had assumed they were all, well, in a relationship, so when Kathrine begrudgingly introduced herself as Jimmy's wife (they'd have an argument about it when Sam and Dean went to Sapulpa to ask a Euchee Elder about any local legends) they opened up.

Part of her was disgusted at how closed-minded they were, and a glance at Jimmy showed that he felt the same.

As they started to head back, Jimmy's phone rang. "Dean, what is it?" Her brother said something that had him frowning before putting the phone on speaker.

"What's going on?" She asked.

" _You have to get the family away from Oasis, before sunset,_ " Dean said. " _Any chance you can use those supposed wings of yours?_ "

"No, bedrest, remember? I can try to convince them I smelled gas, but suggestions take a lot out of me."

* * *

It didn't go well.

Well, it did, but by the time she was able to even begin to convince them, Sam and Dean were running up to them. "It's 12 am. They're coming at any minute now. We need to go,"

Kathrine looked around. "Too late, listen," Everyone went quiet, and faintly, they could hear buzzing noises. "Get inside. We need shelter,"

As they ran in, the woman ran downstairs. "What's happening?" She asked.

"Is there anybody else in the neighborhood?"

"No, it's just us."

"I need towels,"

As Sam and Matt went upstairs, she stood in the chaos, unsure of what to do.

* * *

"You, uh, seemed pretty out of it last night," Sam said as they found a hotel room just outside of Hutchison.

"Yeah, it's just…" she sighed, looking down at her hands. "Maybe I should go,"

"What?"

The blonde shrugged. "You and Dean, you two are supposed to be by yourselves. It was always like that. And then I came in, and then I dunno how Jimmy came into the picture, but… you aren't even supposed to meet him for another three years. I'm- _we're_ in the way, and you can't deny stuff would be easier if it was just you two again,"

"Is this because of when you went missing for two months?" Sam asked, and she nodded. "Dean, he's not angry. Relieved, really, that you came back, even if he'd never say it himself."

"Sam, you… you don't need to lie to me. And even then, if he isn't angry, then I am." She stood up and started walking towards the small kitchenette area. "Besides, this next job w-you'll do, it's best if it's just you and Dean. No need for any extra confusion."

* * *

_But I believe the world is burning to the ground,_

_Oh well, I guess we're gonna find out,_

"Kathy,"

"Don't," she murmured as he moved to turn the radio down. He paused before dropping his hand back on his knee.

_Let's see how far we've come,_

_Let's see how far we'll go._

_Well, I believe it's all coming to an end,_

_Oh well, I guess we're gonna pretend._

_Let's see how far we've come,_

_Let's see how far we'll go._

"Isn't this from 2007?"

"I like it," she tightened her grip on the wheel as the sign flashed in the lights. _Pontiac, 50 miles_. With a sigh, she forced herself to turn the music down. "What are you going to tell them?"

"The truth," for a second, his voice was gravelly, similar to how Castiel had always spoken-

"Yeah, that'll go over well." she snorted before dropping her voice an octave. " _Hi Amelia, I'm Jimmy, but not the Jimmy you know. You see, my mind is from a world where you had an affair back in 2003, and it caused us to get divorced, and that Kathrine lady I talked about was my new wife who I was forced to leave when an angel possessed me to go help her brothers. Oh, by the way, she's an angel too._ "

"I don't sound like that," he protested, making her give him a dry look. "I'll… think about it a bit more."

"It has to be her choice," she reminded him, more for her comfort. "And we both have to accept whatever she says or does."

_I believe the world is burnin' to the ground,_

_Oh well, I guess we're gonna find out._

_Let's see how far we've come._

_Let's see how far we'll go..._

* * *

She stayed in the car.

A large part of her wanted to drive off, to just pretend as if the last few months hadn't happened and she broke away from Sam and Dean before she could fuck up the universe anymore.

But instead, she stayed and watched the silhouettes fight silently, Amelia apparently gesturing frantically whereas Jimmy stayed calm. At least, she thought he did. It was hard reading the body language of shadows.

_Kathrine, I, uh, is this working?_

She jolted as Sam's voice echoed in her head, relaxing a little as she realized what it was. Reaching down into her purse on the floor, she pulled out her phone and dialed the man in question. " _Hello?_ "

"Hi Sam, you called?"

" _No, I didn't?_ "

"Yeah, you did. You prayed to me. It's the equivalent of a voicemail, in laymen's terms," she explained. "What's up?"

" _I've… been having these dreams. Of the old house in Kansas…_ "

She let out an understanding noise. "Listen to your dreams, Sam," she murmured. "They're rarely wrong." Something moved from the corner of her eye, and as she turned, she could see Jimmy walking towards her, upset, but… relieved? Pained? She couldn't tell. "Hey, I gotta go. Lemme know if you need anything else, yeah?" She hung up without a response, just as he got in the car.

When he opened the door, the light came on, and as she saw the red handprint on his face, she knew what had happened.

She reached up and threaded enough grace to make the mark vanish before turning the car on and driving off without another word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: I've been reading over who Jophiel was, as an archangel in the teachings, and, apparently, it's widely accepted that Jophiel did many numerous things. For instance, she was one of the ones who helped cast Adam and Eve out. She was also claimed to have taught 70 languages to souls at the dawn of creation. The Zohar lists her as a Great Angel Chief in charge of 53 legions who superintend Torah-readings on the Sabbath. Jophiel is also said to be a companion to the angel Metatron.


	7. Scarecrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kathrine and Jimmy attempt a solo hunt

To say Sam and Dean were angry that she hadn't told them that Mary's ghost was a thing was an understatement.

In all honesty, she wasn't expecting a call from Dean of all people, but she wasn't just going to ignore it. Even if it was at 3 am.

"Dean?" She asked. "What's wrong?"

" _Dad called. He wants us to work a case in Indiana while he hunts down the demon in California. We're in Ohio right now._ "

She swallowed and tightened her grip. "Are you asking me to take over the case or to get John away from California?"

There was a moment of silence before Dean let out an aggravated noise. " _The case. Sam and I will get Dad, and then we're meeting at Bobby's, no arguments._ "

"Just give me the town's name and we'll have it done as soon as we get there," she promised.

" _We?_ "

Right, he… didn't know. "Jimmy and Amelia talked, the days you two were in Lawrence. She… did the same thing in this world as she had in ours, she was just a little more stealthy about it. He's been hunting with me since, though he's more sitting on the sidelines and watching and researching."

" _So what, you're gonna try for the apple pie life again?_ "

"No, those days are behind me," she immediately denied. "I spent too long running away from the family business, I need to stay in it."

There was a pause, and she wondered if it had been too fast, too quick to claim the family business when he finally spoke. " _Good. It would be boring without you out there Princess._ "

"Don't call me that. Where's the case at?"

" _Place called Burkittsville. Couples have vanished for years, always on the second week of April._ "

"So there's a high likelihood we'll get taken to use as some sort of sacrifice," she frowned. "Y'know, this sounds a little familiar? I think there's a demon that likes to mess with you guys somewhere near you. Name starts with an M, but can't remember more."

" _I'll have Sam keep a lookout,_ " Dean hung up the phone, making her huff in amusement as Jimmy stirred from the bed across from her.

"Who was that?" He asked, voice thick from sleep.

"Dean. John called him and Sam. They're going to Cali to get him while we're going to Burkittsville, Indiana. Couples are going missing on the second week of April." She glanced over at him. "Go back to sleep. I'll wake you in a couple more hours."

* * *

The car they had wasn't the impala, but it was still a noticeable car to hunters, a chevy 210 1956. Apparently, Bobby had stashed a few cars across the country for if hunters had to ditch their rides, so she took the first one she had seen when Dean had shown her, Sam, and Jimmy.

They stopped halfway to search more on the case before pulling up to a cafe. "Here's a good place as ever to start," she said, reaching for the two latest victims. "How are we going to do this?"

"Family friends?" he suggested. "We could be retracing their steps."

"Sounds good," she agreed. "I'll claim to be his cousin."

As they stepped onto the cafe porch, she glanced around it a little before seeing a single man sitting in a chair. "Scotty?" Jimmy asked.

"Yep," the man said.

"I'm Kathy, and this is Jimmy. We were wondering if you've ever seen these people," she pulled out Holly's and Vince's photos. "They're family, my cousin in-laws, and everyone's been so torn up about them just vanishing off the face of the earth."

"Sorry," he said, handing the flyers back. "We don't get many strangers around here."

"Thank you," Jimmy said and they turned back to head to the car.

"He knows something," she murmured.

* * *

She was getting some snacks (Bobby and Dean would kill her if she got chocolate and it melted on the seats, but it just sounded so damned good) while Jimmy talked to the man behind the counter. She was 'debating' over what flavor of jerky to get as she listened to what was said.

"You said they were friends of yours?"

"Yes," he replied as a woman came downstairs with some boxes in hand.

"Did he have a tattoo?" she asked innocently, instantly getting Kathrine's attention.

"He did," Jimmy answered, showing the picture to her.

"You remember? They were just married." The new woman said, and holy shit, she never heard someone change their tune so fast.

"You're right." The man agreed. "They did stop for gas. Weren't here more than ten minutes."

"Right," she murmured, sharing a look with Jimmy. "Do you know if they might've rented a room here or?"

"I told 'em how to get back to the Interstate. They left town."

It was a lie.

Her grip on the jerky tightened a little before she relaxed and smiled. "Could you give us those directions? We're both horrible with getting back to main roads,"

* * *

"Do you believe them?"

"No. This town has pagan written all over it. I mean, seriously, I get it's April, but weather this good?" They drove past the orchard, and from her purse, she could hear her EMF going wild. "Hold on," pulling back around and into the row of trees, she shared a look with the man as he reached into her bag to reveal the frantically beeping meter.

"It's not faulty," he murmured, and in near unison, they opened their doors and stepped out of the vehicle. Letting him go one way, she walked down the row of trees, the feeling of being watched not disappearing.

_Kathrine, I found something. This scarecrow isn't right._

As she jogged over, she saw him in a tree, looking at one of the… "That's a human arm," she blurted out.

"Tattoo is similar to Vince's," he looked a bit green in the face as he climbed down.

"It'll get better," she promised quietly. "Let's go find a library to do some more research. Pagans with sickles."

* * *

"Why are sickles so common?" she groaned, letting her forehead bump against the table.

"I don't know, sorry." he let out a hum. "There's… Kronos."

"No, not him," she denied. "I was there when we dealt with him. Maybe it's a bit more eastern? Not quite Asia, but still in Europe."

* * *

"So how do you know about cars?" Jimmy asked as she worked on the car that Emily had pointed out. She hadn't gone in to talk to them, especially if her hunch was correct.

"Dad, uh, John, he owned a mechanic shop before Mom died. He used to take Dean and me in so Mom could have a break, especially when she was pregnant with Sam. He still owns it, and Dean'll get the deed if he hasn't already. And then when we were on the road, I was the eldest and most eager to help make things better, so I became the fixer when he wasn't there or too hurt to do it," she glanced up at him, seeing his stormy face. "I've come to terms that while he wasn't the best of fathers, he still did his best."

"Still," Jimmy murmured. "That's a horrid thing to put your child through."

She thought back to Jack and Claire and grimaced. "Yeah," she agreed quietly. "It is."

* * *

"So now what?" the couple she had helped were angry at her for touching their car without consent but were quite happy to leave.

Scotty and the Sherif, however?

Well, let's just say between getting shot in the head and pretending to faint, she would prefer not to test how injured her grace would let her be. Of course, she was completely aware of Emily's demands, wanting to know what was going on after Jimmy caught her and then was promptly knocked out.

After a while, they were put in a cellar, and the second the door closed, she was up and healing Jimmy. "Sorry," she said as he woke with a groan, not moving from where his head was in her lap. "It was this or get shot."

"We don't know how to kill it," he said. "Or what it is."

Silence filled the air before she spoke again. "I can send you out so you can do more research," she murmured. "You can find a phone, call Sam and Dean, tell them what happened."

"They'd be halfway to California by now," he argued, but she shook her head.

"They'd be lingering for another hour or so," but still, he shook his head before finally sitting up, making her sigh. "If they don't come, this'll kill anything," she pulled out her blade, carefully balancing it in one hand. "And… it stays, in the event of my death."

"No, you're not going to die," he snapped, and just looked at him.

"You can't die either," she pointed out, voice barely a whisper, his face instantly becoming torn. "If you do, then he'll burn out Claire."

It was a topic neither wanted to discuss, but she knew that they had to, in the end.

What were they going to do when Castiel needed to walk the Earth?

* * *

"Any word yet?"

Sam shook his head as he hung up the phone again. "No answer from either of them. Think they got jumped?"

"We did send them as a couple," Dean pointed out, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. "It's definitely a pagan god… we didn't even ask if she had enough mojo to fight it without hunter help."

"What makes you say that?" Sam asked.

"The annual cycle of its killings? And the fact that the victims are always a man and a woman. Like some kind of fertility right." Dean shrugged before he turned the impala's engine over and started to drive off.

"Interstate is the other way," Sam pointed out.

"And they're going to be sacrificed to some god, Sam. Dad can wait."

* * *

There was arguing above them, in the cafe, as her phone rang over and over before finally stopping.

"I'm sorry," she said after everything went quiet. "I messed this up somehow and dragged you over here with me."

"I'm glad you did," he said back. "You aren't alone, not for this. Never for this." She could feel him squeeze her hand before she glanced up.

"You're… not mad? About anything?"

"I'm angry at a lot of things," he admitted. "But none of them are ever towards or about you."

_Add another few things on the list we'll probably fight over_ _,_ she thought before shaking her head and glancing at him again. Barely a month had gone by since the split, and despite him saying otherwise, she could see him changing, becoming more hesitant about things. _He wanted to know my world, and now that he's in it, he wants out… I'll get him out, once the three months are over._

* * *

_Kathrine, we found out what it is. It's a Vanir, a Norse god of protection. The scarecrow is an effigy to it. One male and one female get sacrificed to it for prosperity._

"Sam figured out what it is," she said, making Jimmy jump and turn to her. "Vanir, which makes sense now that I think about it. Didn't say how to kill it, but at least now we know the blade will definitely work.

Then the cellar door opened, and the older townsfolk were standing at the top. "Come along now,"

"How many have you sacrifices then?" She demanded, standing up slowly. "100? 200? It'd be closer to 500, wouldn't it? 250 years. How much blood do you have on your hands?"

"We don't kill them." The sheriff said, grabbing her arm and pulling her towards the orchard.

"How many cars have you hidden? Clothes? Families that you lied to?" Jimmy demanded, but they didn't answer. They were placed on opposite trees, facing one another, and as the four elders walked away, she looked at him, doing her best to memorize the difference between how Jimmy reacted versus how Castiel had reacted.

Was… was it bad, that she was comparing them?

She had come to terms shortly after Castiel came back from The Empty that had she met him earlier, she would've most definitely had feelings for him, but… now Jimmy here was her Jimmy, so willing to stay with her even as she pushed him away and…

God, she was an idiot.

"I love you," she whispered, making him pause.

"Kathy?" he asked. "What's wrong?"

"Everything," she answered. "I… I need you to close your eyes. I need to leave my vessel, and it'll be unpleasant for both of us."

"But… you're the only thing-"

"I know," she interrupted quietly. "Which is why once I stop this, I'll be sick for the next month. Like, unable to move sick. Angels can't use a vessel without consent, and that's something a soulless vessel can't do."

"A body can live without a soul?"

"Only after its third birthday. I… I don't know how this body will act. I never left to check on heaven, and when heaven was locked up, none of the angels I cared for were still in there." she glanced back at him, watching as his face wavered between uncertainty and wariness before he seemed to decide something.

"I'll take care of you," he said. "No matter what. I've lost you twice, Kathy. I won't let it be a third."

She smiled as he closed his eyes, tense, and she closed her own eyes. _Never thought I'd willing leave a vessel ever again_ _,_ she thought, tugging at the strings that tied her down.

Vaguely, she could hear the Vanir screeching, and humans yelling, and when she opened one of her many eyes, two of the elders were lying unconscious, eyes burnt out, and the Vanir was barely better.

If she was in her vessel, she'd say a cold indifference was what she felt, but feelings are different for angels, so she merely circled the god, squeezing it tight, letting her grace flare again, searching for the oldest tree that reeked of magic.

* * *

Kathrine Winchester, for the first time, opened her eyes.

Distantly, Jimmy knew he should have his own closed, but he couldn't stop himself from peeking at the white-yellow-blue grace that was Jophiel, but even eventually, it began to sting, so he shifted his gaze down and caught sight of stunning green eyes.

"Kathy?" He asked, mouth moving before his mind could stop it, and the woman blinked, glancing up and sneering at the light before looking at him.

"If you want me to be, I suppose," she said, and her voice was actually lower, a touch raspier. "Angel bitch up there doesn't like that name."

"Don't call her that."

"Why? Does it hurt you? Does it sting, knowing she'll fall, because she loves you? Oops, wait, she already fell, multiple times," the woman - vessel - laughed cruelly. "Oh, when heaven finds out an angel is laying waste to some small town in Indiana? They're gonna drag her to heaven and throw her away in their precious little jail. They'll tear the bitch apart, and I can only dream of watching it happen." Suddenly, a tree in the distance caught fire, and Jimmy could see two figured running towards him and the cackling vessel.

"What did they do to her?" Dean demanded.

"Don't untie her!" He yelled as Sam moved towards her. "Jophiel had to leave the vessel. It's soulless. Don't listen to what she says."

"You're all gonna burn in hell!" The vessel giggled. "Oh, she remembered all the screams every time she tried to save you, and she always ran away, leaving you to burn!"

"Where is she?" Dean finished untying him. "Which way?"

"We can't look at her when she comes back," he argued. "She'll burn our eyes out by accident."

* * *

_Jophiel, Sam and Dean are here._

The angel paused from where she was staring at the cafe house, instead slowly glancing over to the orchard, where there indeed was a black impala sitting, doors wide open and engine idle. Gazing a bit more closely, she could see a blonde woman, tied to a tree, laughing as a blonde man and a brunette man stared at her in horror. There was another brown-haired man, eyes closed, leaning against a tree.

Tilting her head, she ventured closer, not getting too close. Humans were fragile, after all.

_Jophiel, please, we need to leave before heaven finds us._

She could hear an echo as if the prayer was being relayed to her, but her connection to the Host was fine… right? Frowning with all four faces, she tugged on the prayer curiously, watching as the second brown-haired man's eyes snapped open, glancing up at-

His eyes weren't burning out? Curious.

He quickly averted his gaze, saying something to the other two men, who shared looked but closed their eyes. Slowly, she danced forward. " _How do you know my name?_ " She whispered.

_Jophiel, don't you remember? I'm Jimmy… Jimmy Novak?_

She frowned, but upon looking, found a locked door to her memories. " _Is that woman my vessel, Jimmy Novak? It has no soul._ "

_You said it would make you sick, but that you had to go back in. I swore to take care of you._

Her heads tilted, and when she glanced at his face and soul, something in her being relaxed. " _Very well. But know this: caring for an archangel is not something to do lightly,_ " she warned, keeping her true voice low. " _Some might see it as a lifelong commitment._ "

She didn't hear what he said in his human language, instead turning to the empty vessel. It sneered at her in the primal language, but she just tilted her heads. The vessel hesitated, and then, from what she could tell, started to yell more.

She struck, pain and fever all but piercing through her as she opened her eyes.

"Sam, Dean," she called weakly, the ropes being the only thing holding her up. " _Jimmy…_ "

The last thing she was aware of was the dangerous clap of thunder and sudden downpour as the three men lurched into action.


	8. Love and Faith

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys go rawhead hunting while Kathrine shows Jimmy what she had experienced years ago

Gabriel found them just before the garrison led by Raphael did.

Sam and Dean jumped when the smaller man appeared in front of them, barely even sending them a glance as he saw Jimmy holding Kathrine. "I have a warded house you two can use," he said, making the man hesitate. "You don't have time. You hear that?" Another clap of thunder, far closer. "That's Raphael, looking for Jophie. Either you come with me, or you let her get taken."

"Who the hell are you?" Dean called out, and the man finally glanced at him as Jimmy nodded with another thunderclap.

"I'm the one saving your skins," he said before snapping his fingers.

* * *

Her eyelids felt heavy and when she tried to open them, they refused to comply.

She couldn't even groan as she felt someone gently grab her hand and squeeze. "Be safe," someone murmured. After a moment, the person holding her hand sighed. "Sam and Dean went out on a hunt. It's been two weeks. They think there's a rawhead in Kansas City."

_Katty?_

_Sam? What's wrong?_

_It-it's Dean. There's been an accident and… Dean had a heart attack._

_What? He's only 27!_

_It gets worse. The doctors, they're all saying he only has a month left._

_I'll be there as soon as possible._

"'Een," she mumbled, and the hand tightened.

"Kathy? Can you hear me?" That was…

"'Immy,"

"Yeah, I'm here. Are you ok? Do you need anything?"

She wanted to open her eyes, to look at his face, but her body refused. "'Een, 'am"

"Dean and Sam?" he asked. "I might be able to catch up with them. I'll be back," lips pressed against her forehead, and suddenly, she was gone and-

She was alone.

_Alonealonealonealonealone_

_Whereflock_

_Wheremate_

By the time that the door creaked open, her breathing had quickened and it was very hard to breathe. "Woah, hey, what the hell is happening?"

"Kathy, you're ok! You're safe,"

"Is she having a seizure?"

Her grace wanted to reach out, to feel for their souls and make sure she wasn't hearing things, but three different sets of hands clamped down on her shoulders and legs. Distantly, she was aware of them talking, but as her grace refused to reach, she was stuck and-

Why couldn't she just move?

* * *

She still couldn't move as Sam and Dean left a couple of days later, leaving Jimmy to fret over her in the safe house, all four anxious for different reasons. Her hearing and sense had gotten better, though, and she could hear conversations said across the house.

" _Sam?_ "

" _Jimmy…_ "

She recognized that tone and wanted to cry. " _Sam, what's wrong?_ "

" _Dean, he's… he's in the hospital. He got electrocuted by his stun gun when the rawhead jumped on him and… he had a heart attack. A bad one. The doctors, they say he's going into heart failure._ "

Jimmy cursed, and she knew why; his father had passed away from heart failure, and it wasn't a quick, painless death. " _Which hospital? I can try and get there with Kathrine._ "

" _How… is she? Can she…?_ " _heal_ was unspoken, but all three of them heard.

" _She still can't move. Hasn't spoken since the seizure either. And even if she could move, Sam… I think something's wrong with her grace. I can feel it, faintly. Humans aren't supposed to feel it, period, and if we do, it definitely shouldn't be that weak._ "

" _Is she-_ " Sam cut himself off and she cursed herself as she still couldn't open her eyes. " _They'll get better. They have to._ "

* * *

She was at the lake, again, with Jimmy, but Gabriel, her previous world's Castiel, _and_ Jack were there.

It was kinda funny, seeing them size each other up. Well, Gabriel, Castiel, and Jack were staring at one another, but Jimmy just threaded their hands together and pressed his head against hers. "How're you?" he murmured.

"Tired of laying down," she murmured back. "I wish I could move. Sam and Dean…" she trailed off and swallowed. _They lasted 22 years without me_ , she thought, _they don't actually need me._

"You were there, the first time," he said, making her nod mutely. "You said it was a business trip."

"Family business," she corrected. "We weren't even in the first year of us dating yet. You saw how long it took me to tell you who I really was, and even then, it was only because Dean got resurrected."

His face looked slightly troubled. "What're they going through?"

She glanced over at the other three, Gabriel staring at Jack so oddly. A second after she looked, they were gone. "I don't know how you're in my head," she said, looking at him. "But I can show you." He hesitated before nodding.

* * *

She was getting ready for a lunch date when her phone rang, making her set aside the eyeshadow and pick up the phone. " _Katty?_ " Sam's voice immediately said, sending her on edge.

"Sam? What's wrong?"

" _It-it's Dean. There's been an accident and… Dean had a heart attack._ "

"What? He's only 27!"

" _It gets worse. The doctors, they're all saying he only has a month left._ "

"I'll be there as soon as possible." She hung up the phone and immediately pulled out the makeup wipes, clearing her face off. She grabbed her Hunter go bag and went to her shitty 95 Toyota. As she started it, she dialed Jimmy's number.

" _Kathrine?_ "

"Hey, so there's an issue with the family business my father and brothers do," she began, trying to keep it vague. "They asked if I could go over to them for a couple of weeks. Apparently one of them needs me to cover for them."

" _What about your shifts for the hospital?_ "

"I'll call Melissa. She knows why I can't show." Melissa had been her only constant friend growing up, and the one who helped her get out of the hunter lifestyle. If anyone could explain stuff to civilians, it was her. "Sorry to just cancel like this."

" _Your family needs you, it's ok,_ " he promised.

* * *

She could hear Sam and Dean talking before she all but slammed the door open, her breath catching at the sight of her baby brother, pale and sitting on the hospital bed, dark circles under his eyes.

"That fabric softener teddy bear. Oh, I'm gonna hunt that little bitch down."

She couldn't stop the strangled laugh as she fully stepped into the room. "What did the bear do to you Dean-o?"

"Katty," Sam said, while Dean just flipped her off, but when she went to hug him, he returned it weakly.

"Why didn't you guys tell me it was a _rawhead_ the last time you called?" she demanded, pulling away to glare at them. "I would've taken care of it for y'all!"

"You're out," Dean grunted, glancing away. "Besides, we didn't know at the time."

"Can you…" Sam trailed off, and Kathrine paused, glancing at Dean. After he nodded, she put a palm between his shoulder blades and did her best to heal his failing heart. When she opened her eyes, she could feel them stinging as she slowly shook her head.

"No, at least, not fully," she answered. "You'll have a year, rather than a month."

"Thank you," Sam whispered. "We can start looking for other ways to-"

"No," Dean interrupted, turning the TV off and making his siblings look at him as if he were crazy. "Look, Sammy, Katty, it's a dangerous gig. I drew the short straw. That's it, end of story."

"No, that's not it," she snapped.

"We still have options," Sam agreed.

"What options? Yeah, burial or cremation. And I know it's not easy. But I'm gonna die. And you can't stop it."

It felt like she had been slapped in the face. Sure, she's had siblings before, and yeah, they've died before her too, but… Sam and Dean were the first ones she's cared about in a long time. Hearing those words from him…

"Watch us," Sam growled.

* * *

" _This John Winchester. I can't be reached. If this is an emergency, call my son, Dean. 866-907-3235. He can help._ "

Kathrine swallowed as she held the phone up, hand shaking. Sam had already left his voicemail, and he thought that hearing her voice would talk some sense into their father. "John, it's, uh… It's Kathrine. I know- I know the last time we talked, it wasn't really… a good time, but Dean's hurt. He-he's dying, and they don't want to say it, but they need their dad. _We_ need the man who swore to protect us when we were born. There's a faith healer in Nebraska, everyone who goes to him gets healed, and… we're going to try. Dean- he'd like you to be there… _I'd_ like you to be there. I'm…" she trailed off, unable to stop a sob from escaping her. "I'm so tired of fighting."

She frantically closed the phone and sunk to the bathroom floor, sobs shaking her body violently as she wondered, not for the first time, why she fell in the first place if all it led to was pain.

* * *

"Man, you are a lying bastard. Thought you said we were going to see a doctor." she rolled her eyes at Dean's tone, letting him lean on one of her arms while Sam took his other side.

"We said specialist," she corrected.

"Look, Dean, this guy's supposed to be the real deal."

"I can't believe you brought me here to see some guy who heals people out of a tent." he glanced at her when she said this, making her huff.

"I faintly recall healing a broken bone in a doghouse, so don't look at me like that," He just showed a cheeky grin, making her shake her head.

"When was the doghouse?" Sam asked.

"You were five, maybe six," she answered. "A ghoul was tunneling underground like a mole, so we played a game where we pretended we were dogs and went into this oversized dog house meant for, like, two or three great danes. Dean had gotten his arm caught in the flap and the ghoul broke it before I could pull it in."

"You never said that was a case," Sam said. "I always thought you two had gone insane,"

"Oh, Sammy," she grinned up at him. "I've always been insane!"

They passed a man arguing with a local cop, and as they settled down into a seat, Dean grimaced. "C'mon, a faith healer?"

"Maybe it's time to have a little faith, Dean," Sam murmured, and she would've found the entire thing hilarious if she wasn't so worried for Dean.

"You know what I've got faith in? Reality. Knowing what's really going on."

"How can you be a skeptic? With the things we see every day?"

"Exactly. We see them, we know they're real."

"But if you know evil's out there, how can you not believe good's out there, too?"

"Because I've seen what evil does to good people."

Kathrine was content to just let them have at it, but a woman in front of them turned around and smiled at Dean. "Maybe God works in mysterious ways,"

She couldn't stop her snort at this. Really, telling an archangel's brother that God is mysterious? Too ironic. Unfortunately, it got her a dark look from the woman and her mother. "Sorry, I do go to church," she grinned sheepishly. "I've just heard that so much, it makes me laugh now."

"I think you just turned me around on the subject," Dean decided, and this time her snort was met with a laugh.

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"I'm Dean. This is Sam and Kathrine."

"Layla. So, if you're not a believer, then why are you here?"

"Well, apparently my siblings here believe enough for the three of us," he grumbled.

"Don't be such a sour puss," she huffed, knowing he'll come to eat those words one day. Hopefully not soon, but as soon as she felt like heaven wouldn't hunter her down… she'd reveal herself, and pray that they didn't hate her.

"Each morning, my wife, Sue Ann, reads me the news. Never seems good, does it? Seems like there's always someone committing some immoral, unspeakable act. But, I say to you, God is watching. God rewards the good, and He punishes the corrupt. It is the Lord who does the healing here friends. The Lord who guides me in choosing who to heal by helping me see into people's hearts."

Kathrine had closed her eyes, her grace slowly warming as the people agreed to what the reverend was saying. It wasn't the usual way she recharged her grace, she'd admit to that, but it was certainly much needed after healing Dean.

"Yeah, and into their wallets." the said man murmured, and her eyes snapped open.

"You think so, young man?" Roy asked, and the crowd went silent, all staring at him.

"Sorry."

"No, no. Don't be. Just watch what you say around a blind man, we've got real sharp ears."

"What's your name, son?"

"Dean."

"Dean. I want-I want you to come up here with me."

Kathrine paused, slowly moving her gaze from her brother to the reverend and-

Holy shit.

Oh god, they had to leave.

_Now._

"No, it's ok." Dean started. _Good boy_ , she agreed.

"What are you doing?!" Sam hissed.

"You've come here to be healed, haven't cha?"

Her gaze once again flickered to the stage, where something else flickered, just out of her supernaturally enhanced sight. Dean, beside her, hesitated before answering. "Well, yeah, but ahh... maybe you should just pick someone else."

"Oh, no. I didn't pick you, Dean, the Lord did."

"Get up there!" Sam encouraged, but Kathrine just kept staring at the slowly forming Reaper, her heart thundering in her chest.

Someone had caged a Reaper.

Someone was changing the Death List.

Dean slowly went onto the stage and stood next to Roy, causing her gaze to flicker between the two. "Pray with me, friends," the reverend called out, and everyone else but her lifted their arms and joined hands as he placed a hand on Dean's shoulder and then head.

And then Dean's eyes were glazed, and the Reaper was fully formed and reaching for him and-

The reaper just touched his heart. Dean gasped, Sam shot up, and she just sat there, watching as the reaper walked away to find a new victim to kill.

* * *

Sam and Dean came into the motel room arguing.

"I felt wrong. I felt cold. And for a second...I saw someone. This, uh, this old man. And I'm telling you, Sam, it was a spirit."

"It was a reaper," she corrected quietly, staring at the sketch of the cross she had seen on the altar. "What you saw, it was a reaper."

"What do they do?" Dean asked, and she looked up, tears in her eyes.

"They reap the souls of those who recently died. Someone chained one. They're forcing him to kill, and to heal."

"So, say someone with, oh, stage 4 heart failure was to get healed by this thing?"

She looked away, not wanting to answer. "Kathrine," Sam said, voice breaking. "Tell me we didn't just kill an innocent man."

" _You two_ didn't," she immediately promised, but their faces broke into one of pain, and she cradled her head between her hands. "You didn't. Whoever chained the reaper did."

"Would you have stopped it, if you knew what it was before?"

Dean's question made her pause. Would she have? No. Yes? She didn't know. Sam and Dean, for those 16 years, had been her top priority growing up, and… she couldn't even begin to imagine a world without them.

Dean must've seen the look on her face as he cursed and walked right back out of the door. Sam swallowed a couple of times before asking the one question she didn't have an answer for.

"How do we unchain a reaper?"

* * *

"So Roy's using black magic to bind the reaper?" Dean asked after a few hours.

"If he is, he's riding the whirlwind. It's like putting a dog leash on a great white."

"I don't think it's him," she said. "He seemed to truly believe he's healing people."

"Who would gain from chaining a reaper other than the person who supposedly heals incurable people?" Sam asked, and she shrugged just as her phone rang. On the screen, the name _Jimmy_ came up. "Who's that?"

"No one," she replied in a slightly clipped tone.

"If he's no one, why is he saved into your contacts?" Dean argued, trying to swipe her phone, but she easily grabbed it and tucked it into her bra before his hand could even get close.

"There might be a spellbook in the LeGrange residence that we can try to take. See if it has the counter ritual in there," she suggested.

* * *

"I found this." Sam handed her the little book, and she took it with a grimace. "Hidden in their library. It's ancient. Written by a priest who went dark side. There's a binding spell in here for trapping a reaper."

"Must be a hell of a spell," Dean noted.

"Blood, bones, almost all of it from humans," she answered. "It's close to pure black magic. Do we know why she'd cross that line?"

"Desperate. Her husband was dying, she didn't have anything to save him. She was using the binding spell to keep the reaper away from Roy."

"Damnit," she sighed. "Reapers don't take kindly to being chained, especially if it means not being able to complete the list they're assigned. Either he'll kill the reverend, his wife, or both of them."

"May God save us from half the people who think they're doing God's work," Dean muttered, making her sigh into her beer in agreement.

"We gotta break that binding spell Dean." She tried to ignore how it stung when Sam left her out of it, but… she understood… right?

"You know Sue Ann had a Coptic cross like this. When she dropped it the reaper backed off."

"So you think we gotta find the cross or destroy the alter?"

"The alter," she answered. "There'd be a cup or a bottle for blood. You could always just overturn it as well."

"We better do it soon, or he's healing Layla tonight," Dean murmured.

* * *

She watched as the reaper killed Sue Ann, tensing as he turned to her. After a small moment, he tipped his head before walking away. Sam hesitated beside her.

"Katty?"

"The reaper's gone," she murmured, turning to go find Dean, but something on Sam's face stopped her. "What's wrong?"

"Are…" he hesitated. "Can you come with us? Start hunting again? Dad, he… and with mom's…"

For the briefest of moments, she hesitated, trying to see what a future hunting alongside her brothers again looked like. They'd find their father, and then what? Kill Azazel and kick off the apocalypse? And then there was Jimmy… he had been so close to killing himself through alcohol when she found him that night after her shift; what would he do if she just up and left?

Would she even be able to leave him behind?

Slowly, she regretfully shook her head. "If demons wanted me to start hunting again as they did with you and Dean, I think they would've acted already," she finally answered, and he looked _gutted._

"Dean got out?" he whispered, and she paused again.

"It… isn't really my story to tell, but… he was out for almost an entire year. Back in 97 to mid 98. Ask him about 6 states in 6 days."

Stepping away, she went to go find their brother, who was leaning against the impala.

"You look like hell," he noted. "Want to crash in the room another day before we set off again?"

_Damnit, Dean_ _,_ she thought, shaking her head. "No, I, uh, I should get heading back to Illinois. I might've skipped a couple of nightshifts to get here,"

His face fell, similar to Sam's, but he quickly put his mask back on, nodding. "Right. Gotta live that apple pie life."

"Dean," she sighed, rubbing her face. "Y'know what? If you two are ever near Pontiac, you _will_ stop by. Older Sister orders it,"

"Yes ma'am," Dean grinned, eyes still sad. "Where's your car again?"

"The hospital," she answered with a grimace as Sam walked up to them.

"You Ok?" Sam asked.

Dean shook his head. "Hell of a week."

"Yeah... All right, come on. We should get going."

* * *

" _I'm Ok. Really. I guess if you're gonna have faith... you can't just have it when the miracles happen. You have to have it when they don't._ "

Kathrine leaned against the wall to the door, listening to the conversation, and… she really was a crappy version of an angel, but she could do this, at least.

" _So what now?_ "

" _God works in mysterious ways._ "

" _Goodbye, Dean._ "

" _Well... I'm not much of the praying type...but...I'm gunna pray for you._ "

"Well...There's a miracle right there."

Layla left the room, and Kathrine fell into step with her. "How devoted would you say you are?" she asked, keeping her voice soft.

"I'd like to believe very," the other woman answered. "You?"

"Not as much as I should be," she admitted, gently placing a hand on Layla's arm. "I'm sorry the reverend couldn't heal you, but…"

"But?" Kathrine paused, sending a small flare of grace and gently shrinking the brain tumor. By the time her grace refused to do any more, it was most definitely operable, with a high success chance. "What… what was that?"

"Compensation," she answered. "I couldn't get all of it but… you might want to go to your doctor's soon. God rewards the faithful and believers, I'd like to think."

"Are… are you a healer like Roy was?" she breathed, but Kathrine just shook her head.

"No, I'm… I'd be a terrible faith healer," she gave a wiry smile. "Have a wonderful life, Layla."

* * *

She met up with Jimmy the afternoon after she got him, happily giving him a kiss and a hug.

"Missed you," she murmured.

"Missed you too," he said back. "How was the trip?"

She thought back to the fear for her brother, and fear of the reaper, and forced herself to let out a laugh. "Boring. How was your first day as a consultant? Different from radio ad?"

"Very," he admitted, and this time, her laugh was more genuine.

* * *

Kathrine found herself at the lake again, still hand in hand with Jimmy, who seemed… disoriented?

"Are you ok?" she murmured, and slowly, he nodded.

"It was certainly something, seeing things as you do," he admitted, and her heart froze at his next words. " _Feeling_ as you do."

"Right. Angels… don't feel the same way as humans do," she said. "It's… intense, but distant. If we allow ourselves to become too open, there's a high chance we'll destroy ourselves, but we can't help but feel, each emotion more intense than the last."

"So, those last few months," he began slowly. "They… weren't because of me?"

"No, they were because of me," she answered. "I… I was going to fall completely. Become human and…" her throat went dry as she glanced away.

"And?"

She took a final deep breath. "And… have kids. With you."

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think please!


End file.
